Letter to the deceased (tools from the series “Surviving Grief”). You ask, who is to blame? Let's talk about the dying messages of famous people

A suicide note is an important attribute of voluntary death for a suicide and a way for scientists to penetrate into the last thoughts of a person who voluntarily died. We study what and why people write before they die for centuries.

“Volodka! I am sending you a receipt from the loan office - buy, brother, my velvet jacket and wear it for your health. I'm going on a journey from which no one has ever returned. Farewell, my friend, yours to the grave, which I will soon need"
(student to friend,
late XIX– beginning of the 20th century)

What changes occur in the minds of people who decide to commit suicide? Suicidological studies show that there are quite typical cognitive processes characteristic of potential and actual suicides. For example, consciousness narrows, that is, a person’s thinking becomes fixated on the “all or nothing” principle, when all things are divided into black and white, and a difficult situation is elevated to the rank of completely hopeless. Mental filtering occurs: the individual often fixates on one unpleasant or terrible memory, a moment that constantly pops up in consciousness as proof of the insignificance of his existence. This is complemented by discrediting the positive, when a person denies the significance or the very existence of pleasant and joyful experiences and events, which begin to be perceived painfully, as some kind of atavisms in his life. depressive picture peace. The consciousness of a person in such a state is filled with unbearable heartache, which is becoming increasingly difficult to combat.

“Dear aunt! I'm in the forest now. I'm having fun, picking flowers and looking forward to the train. It would be crazy to ask God for help in what I have in mind, but I still hope to make my wish come true.”
(cool lady (teacher at a girls’ gymnasium),
end of the 19th – beginning of the 20th century)

Suicidologists should great work find data that would broadly and qualitatively cover the mental state of a suicide. First of all, stories and written notes from surviving suicides are used for this, where they describe in detail how their consciousness sometimes changed over the course of several months before they decided to take the last step. Another valuable material is suicide notes, last words a person who has crossed the line. However, usually only 15-40% of suicides leave suicide letters, which limits the possibility of using this source as the most reliable for interpreting the motives of suicides. But in criminology to classify death as suicide suicide note- one of the strongest arguments (along with the characteristic manner of death, place and family circumstances). Of course, there is always the possibility of a forged note intended to make a murder look like suicide, but this moment There is a whole well-developed technique that is aimed at distinguishing false suicide notes from real ones.

“I was very tired of this whirlwind of emotions, so I decided to put an end to it by leaving this life.”
(woman sixty years old,
end of 20th century)

A suicide note tells a lot: what a person felt, what he was thinking, who he would like to see in last moment, what he advises those loved ones whom he leaves, and most importantly, what is the motive for his reluctance to continue life under any conditions. “Suicide note” is the most accurate expression. This is a really short message that most often fits on a notebook or printed sheet. But there are also real suicide letters - long treatises touching on a variety of topics - from unrequited love to current political and economic situation. It is characteristic that the functionality of paper is in this case limited - only a few close people, a few police officers and investigators will read the farewell words of a suicide (except in cases where suicide notes are published in the media). The Internet, in particular, can be considered as a new public space for writing suicide letters. social media. Here thousands of people will be able to see and read the dying message, which, however, sometimes takes on a demonstrative blackmail character.

“We will leave beautifully”
(Denis Muravyov, Katerina Vlasova,
2016)

Perhaps the first suicide note was written on papyrus.

“...Who am I talking to now?
The brothers are angry
And a righteous person is considered an enemy.
Who am I talking to now?
There are no righteous left
The land was given to the creators of lawlessness...

Death is before me now
Like the smell of myrrh,
Like sailing in the wind.
Death is before me now
Like the smell of lotus flowers,
Like sweet drunken madness.
Death is before me now
How I long to return to my home
After many years in captivity"

These poetic lines, a spiritual cry from almost four thousand years ago, are now in Berlin Museum. They were written by an unknown Egyptian on papyrus, presumably during the Middle Kingdom (2040–1783 BC) in Ancient Egypt. Most of papyrus was lost, but four poems survived, each of which began with its own anaphora and represented a conversation between a person and his soul. The text contains many religious and philosophical references that reflect the worldview of the Egyptians of that time, but here’s what’s interesting: the state of depressive reflection in which the author is immersed exactly corresponds modern description state of mind patients suffering from severe depression. This is the same conflict with conscience due to the desire to commit suicide, depression, uncertainty about the future, gloomy picture peace, paranoia. And even this detail: the Egyptian believes that others treat him like a bad smell or an unfaithful wife - just as modern patients with severe depressive disorders tend to believe that they exude bad odors. It is difficult to say for sure whether this unfortunate man killed himself in the end, but it seems that the symptoms of depression mental state have not changed for thousands of years.

“I’m tired of living and I’m no good”
(teacher,
end of the 19th – beginning of the 20th century)

Suicide notes have a significant meaning social function: firstly, they identify the “motivational templates” or explanatory schemes existing in society that justify the act of suicide, and secondly, they directly form a person’s idea of ​​standard situations when suicide is recognized as a possible way out of the situation (even with collective condemnation such an exit). There are many examples in history: in the European nobility society XIX century, suicide could be seen as an acceptable alternative to loss of honor. It is precisely this motive that can be identified from this suicide note of an insulted German accused of official embezzlement (late 19th – early 20th century):

"The sun rises for me in last time; it is impossible to live when honor is suspected, the poor heart will stop suffering when it stops beating, but it’s a pity that not from a French bullet.”

And after the publication of Goethe’s novel “Sorrow young Werther“A wave of copycat suicides swept across Europe among young people who considered suicide out of unrequited love to be a wonderful romantic act. And subsequently such a death became established as a literary cliche.

“I begged her on my knees to come back, but she didn’t understand. Goodbye everyone!
(Vitaly Zheleznov,
year 2014)

Is suicide considered justifiable if the reason was the departure of a spouse? IN modern society such a reason most likely does not seem weighty enough. But the cultural taboo on suicide and public rejection of this phenomenon only works within certain limits. While the case is abstract, people tend to condemn suicide. However, with the advent of a real incident, the attitude towards this changes:

“Dear Mary, I am writing these lines to you because they are the very last. I actually thought you and little Joe would come back into my life, but you never did. I know that you found another person, obviously better than me. I hope this son of a bitch dies. I love you very much and so does Joe. It’s very painful to think that nothing worked out for you and me. I dreamed a lot about our life together, but it turned out to be just dreams. I always hoped that they would come true, but now I am absolutely sure that this will never happen. I hope to end up in heaven, although in my case I will probably end up in hell..."

The suicide note, as it were, animates the specific case of one unfortunate person, it reveals his motives, his experiences, which can be understood; empathy is activated. The social idea “suicide is bad” fades into the background, and instead it is replaced by compassion and human understanding.

“...Please take care of little Joe, because I love him with all my heart. Don't tell him what happened. Say that I have gone far, far away and perhaps someday I will return. Add that you don't know exactly when. Well, it seems that's all. Take care of yourself. P.S. I know that we had chances to make peace, but you didn’t want it, you wanted to fuck someone else, well, now you’ve achieved it. I can't really tell if I hate you or love you. You'll never know. Sincerely, your husband George"
(male twenty-four years old,
end of 20th century)

A suicide note is the last communicative act of a person who has decided to take his own life. Suicidologists identify certain parameters for the analysis of suicide notes, which make it possible to understand the experiences and emotional states suicides, as well as characteristic, recurring motifs; Ultimately, this helps suicide prevention service experts act more effectively.

Suicide letters in most cases have addressees. Often this is a spouse, children, mother, or other loved ones. These are letters about an apology, a wish to continue living happily, about love, and occasionally it can be a cynical message:

“My dear parents, I inform you that I am white light I quit, and you be healthy"
(a young man from a merchant family,
end of the 19th – beginning of the 20th century)

In some cases, when an act of suicide plays the role of a protest against the structure of society, the addressee becomes a mass audience. For example, this is a note from entrepreneur Ivan Ankushev, who, before committing suicide, committed several murders of the city ruling elite of Kirovsk (2009):

“Letter about confrontation. I, entrepreneur Ivan Ankushev, do business and own four stores. I am not given the opportunity to do what I think is necessary. There is no hope for the integrity of the arbitration court. You destroyed me. I won't live to see the mushrooms. This is my favorite activity."

Most of the notes touch on certain topics: the most common is an apology for one’s actions or for one’s entire life, the second most mentioned is the inability to bear suffering or pain, then love, practical instructions or advice, and, of course, accusations. Often these topics are combined:

“Forgive me, because today I will die. I just can't live without you. Which means you can die. Maybe there will be peace there. I have such a terrible feeling of emptiness inside that it just kills me. No more strength tolerate him. When you left me I died inside. I must say that I have nothing left but broken heart, and this is what pushes me to do this. I cry out to God to help me, but He doesn't hear me. I had no other choice."
(male thirty-one years old,
end of 20th century)

Death messages are often filled with difficult emotions: guilt and regret, feelings of hopelessness, anger, shame, fear. In most cases, guilt and regret predominate:

“Hana, take care of yourself and your son and forgive me for your warped life: forgive me, my holy Hana! If I can’t get along with you, then who in the world can I live with?”
(lieutenant,
end of the 19th – beginning of the 20th century)

Anger is much less common, and it is more typical for men who accuse their wives of driving them to suicide. But there are also angry messages from women, for example, a letter from an adult pupil orphanage To former teacher(late 19th – early 20th century):

“Did you really dare to say that I was a woman when I got along with you? Know, cursed one, that the child is already moving, and, dying, both I and he curse you. With one word you could restore life to both me and him. You didn't want to. Let all misfortunes be on your head. Suffer only failures in all your endeavors, be a vagabond, a drunkard, and let my curse weigh upon you everywhere and everywhere. I will haunt you day and night... I really want to live.”

Based on an analysis of the emotions, themes and recipients of suicide letters, suicidologists have identified the probable motives for suicide:

Avoidance

(guilt, punishment, suffering)

This is the most frequently mentioned motive - the inability to continue to endure unbearable mental pain, loss, guilt or shame for a socially unacceptable act.

(revenge)

Protest against heavy family problems, against the injustice of society towards the individual, against cruelty - another common motive that occurs much more often among people in age group from twenty-six to thirty-five years old. This motive is often associated with the expression of emotions of anger and blame, and the note is often addressed to a specific person.

“This is revenge, it pressed on my chest”
(Bekir Nebiev, 2015)

Self-punishment

An attempt to punish oneself or atone for actions that are subjectively assessed as difficult and irreparable.

Compulsion

A motive, the purpose of which is to attract the attention of recipients to some problem and force them to change their behavior.

The note may be a desperate attempt to draw the attention of other people to their mental suffering, it is not necessarily demonstrative in nature, and may not be recognized by the person himself as a cry for help.

Motives are often combined and combined with each other. Although not all suicide notes are easy to interpret and indicate the presence of some motives. There are laconic, short messages from which it is difficult to understand anything (late 19th - early 20th centuries): “I want to go to the next world,” “It’s time to play the box.” Or unusual notes containing existential reflections:

“Feelings experienced on the top of the cliff at Kegon Falls: The world is too big and history is too long to be appreciated by such a tiny creature as five feet tall... The true nature of all things is beyond understanding. I decided to die with this thought... Now, on the top of the cliff, I no longer feel anxiety."
(Mi-sao Fujimura, 1903)

Writing a suicide note can be a spontaneous decision, when it is written quickly, on the first piece of paper that comes to hand, or it can be comprehended over a long period of time. Anatoly Koni, a Russian lawyer of the late 19th century, who wrote the work “Suicide in Law and in Life,” gives the following example: “The provincial artist Bernheim, twenty-two years old, is poisoned by cocaine and in a letter to her brother describes in detail the gradual sensation “when the soul flies away under influence of poison,” and ends the letter with an unfinished phrase: “And here comes the end...”.” However, more often there are short dying messages written on a sheet torn from a notebook:

"Don't blame anyone: thorny path life was blocking my path, I tried to free myself, but in vain. Now I don’t want to go anymore and I can’t.”
(teacher, late 19th – early 20th century)

Traditionally, paper is used for suicide letters, but there are exceptions: suicide notes are also found on random objects - scraps of wrapping or toilet paper, prescription forms, the surface of a tablecloth, or even leather. Far from it in a positive sense Social media is becoming an increasingly popular means for publishing dying messages to family, friends and many other people.

Albert Camus wrote: “There is only one truly serious philosophical problem - the problem of suicide. To decide whether life is worth living or not is to answer the fundamental question of philosophy... These are the conditions of the game: you have to give an answer.” this one good philosophical question, but in Everyday life people don't tend to stop and take the time and space to think about the answer. Only for suicides - those who decide that the game is not worth the candle - does the search for a solution become meaningful. And aren’t they looking in their notes for reasons that could refute the value of life with its endless suffering? They can be understood. But the result of reading suicide letter may turn out to be paradoxical: thanks to empathy, readers think about the main philosophical problem: why we exist and how we should live our lives.

Blog"

Derek Miller - writer, musician, marine biologist, and author of the blog Penmachine.

He died of cancer on May 3, 2011, and this post was published after his death. Derek started his blog in 1997. When he learned that he had cancer, he talked about his battle with it on his blog. He wrote about life and himself, about his wife and children, about his illness and about his impending death.
Do yourself a favor and read this post and then call those you love. Life is too short.

That's all. I'm dead and this is my last post. I asked family and friends to post this post after my body could no longer withstand the punishment of cancer. And this is the first step in transferring my blog to the archive.

If you knew me in real life, you've probably already heard the news, but however you find out about it, consider it confirmation. I was born on June 39, 1969 in Vancouver, Canada and died in Burnaby on May 3, 2011, at the age of 41, from complications of stage 4 colorectal cancer. We all knew this would happen.

This includes my family and friends, and my parents Hilka and Jurgen Karl. My daughters, Lauren, 11, and Marina, 13, knew what my wife and I were able to tell them after I was first diagnosed. It became part of their life, unfortunately.

Airdrie

Of course this includes my wife Airdrie (nee Hislop). We were both born in Vancouver, graduated different schools in 1986 and studied biology at UBC (University British Columbia), where they first met in 1988. During the summer I was working as a naturalist in the park and I accidentally hit Eyre's canoe, we collided and had to push it to shore.

We crossed paths on some subjects, and then lost touch. But a few years later, in 1994, I was still working at the university. Airdrie found out my name and wrote me a letter - yes! paper! - and by chance (I was trying to become a musician, so there was complete chaos all around) I answered her. From these seeds grew a whole garden: This happened in March 1994, and in August 1995 we got married. I never regretted it, because we always felt good together, both in sadness and in joy.

However, I never thought that our time together would be so short: 23 years from the first meeting (Kanaka Creek Regional Park, I'm quite sure) until my death. So few. Too few.

What happened at the end

I didn't go to better world, or for the worse. I haven't gone anywhere because Derek doesn't exist anymore. Once my body stopped functioning and the neurons in my brain froze, I made an amazing transformation: from a living organism to a corpse, like a flower or a mouse that had not survived too much. frosty night. It's obvious that once I died, it was all over.

So I was not afraid of death - its very moment and what would happen afterwards, because there would be nothing. As before, I continued to be a little afraid of the dying process itself, of the growing weakness and fatigue, of pain, of the fact that I was becoming less and less myself. I was lucky that my mental faculties were largely intact in the months and years leading up to the end, and there were no signs of brain cancer as far as I know.

As a child, when I first learned to subtract, I calculated how old I would be in the year 2000. The answer was 31, which seemed like a lot. In fact, at 31, I was married with two daughters and working as a technical writer and web guy in the computer industry. Quite mature, in general.

Much was still to come. I started my own blog, which recently turned 10 years old. I didn't return to drum in my band, and I wasn't a podcaster (because there weren't podcasts yet, and there weren't iPhones). In tech land, Google had just arrived and was growing by leaps and bounds, Apple was under siege, Microsoft was big and in charge, and Facebook and Twitter were still a few years away. Three years remained before the launch of the Spirit and Opportunity rovers on Mars, and the Cassini probe was not yet halfway to Saturn. The human genome has not yet been sequenced.

Twin Towers of the World shopping center were still standing in New York. Jean Chrétien was Prime Minister of Canada, Bill Clinton President of the United States, and Tony Blair Prime Minister of Great Britain while Saddam Hussein, Hosni Mubarak, Kim Jong Il, Ben Ali and Muammar Gaddafi maintained power in Iraq, Egypt, North Korea, Tunisia and Libya.

In my family in 2000 my cousin There were still four years left before the baby was born. Another sister began dating the man who is now her husband. Sonya, my mother's friend since she was nine years old, was still alive. Like my grandmother Omma, who was over 90 years old. Neither my wife nor I have ever been hospitalized for a long time. Not yet. None of my daughters were out of diapers yet, let alone taking pictures, writing stories, riding bikes and horses, chatting on Facebook, or having a larger foot size than their mom. We didn't have a dog.

And I didn't have cancer. I had no idea I would have one, certainly not in this decade. And that he will kill me.

Missed

Why do I remember all these things? Because I may regret things I'll never know, but I don't regret things that happened. I could have died in 2000 (at 31) and would have been happy with my life: my amazing wife, wonderful children, great job, and those hobbies that I loved. But I would miss a lot.

And now a lot will happen without me. I have already written that I could not imagine much of what would happen. What will the world be like in 2021, or in 2060, when I would be 91, the age Omma lived to be? What else will we learn? How will countries and people change? How will we communicate and move around? Who will we admire and who will we despise?

What will my wife Eir do? My daughters Marina and Lolo? What will they study, how will they spend their time and earn a living? Will my children have children? Grandchildren? Will there be things in their lives that I cannot understand now?

What is known now that I'm dead

Today there are no answers to these questions. Although I'm still alive as I write this, I'm sad to know I'll miss it. Not because I won't be able to see it, but because I won't be able to support Air, Marina and Lauren in their efforts.

It turns out that no one can imagine what will really happen in our lives. We can plan and do what we love, but we can't expect all our plans to work out. Some are possible, others are probably not. Events and inventions will emerge and things will happen that we could never have foreseen. It's not bad or good. This is reality.

I think and hope that my daughters can learn something from my illness and death. And my wonderful amazing wife Airdrie too. It's not like they could die any day. But that they have to find what brings them joy and excites their mind as much as possible, and be open to new possibilities, and not be disappointed when things don't go their way - which they will.

I was very lucky. I never had to worry about food. I was never afraid that a foreign army would break into my house at night with machetes or machine guns to kill or wound my family. I've never had to run for my life (something I can't do now anyway). It's a shame, but some people have to do this every day.

Wonderful place

Our world, our whole world, is a beautiful, amazing, wonderful place. He is always more than can be known. I don't look back or regret anything, and I hope my family will do the same.

The truth is that I loved them. Lauren and Marina, you have matured and become yourselves all these years, know that I loved you and did everything I could to be a good father to you.

Airdrie, you were my best friend and closest person. I don't know what we would be like without each other, but I think the world would be a poorer place. I loved you immensely, I loved you, I loved you, I loved you.

Greetings to new and regular readers! Friends, “Note to a Late Brother” is real case from my life. There is nothing fictitious in this story. Sometimes inexplicable things happen in people's lives: some incredible coincidences or mysterious phenomena, for which there is no explanation yet.

A little about the soul

It has been proven that the soul of a deceased person leaves his body. This has been reported by thousands of people who have experienced clinical death. Within a period of no more than 3-5 minutes after cardiac arrest, these people saw their body from above or flew in a tunnel.

During a complex operation, my husband “watched” the doctors from above, then his soul flew along the hospital corridor. Life was in question, but he managed to return!

Alas, no one returns after biological death, so there is no answer to the question: is there life after death?

Days of remembrance of the deceased

Body and soul are one. But the body is mortal, the soul is not. After the death of the body, the soul will have to go through ordeals - a kind of exams. In Orthodoxy, the days of remembrance of the dead are traditionally distinguished: the third, ninth and fortieth.

The third day

For three days the soul of the deceased, accompanied by a guardian angel, remains in the world of the living. For three days the soul is tied to the body, and it will have nowhere to go if the body is buried earlier.

On the 3rd day after a person's death, a funeral is usually held. It has spiritual attitude to the Resurrection of Christ on the third day after His death. Due to various circumstances, it is possible to bury the deceased later. For example, on the 4th or 5th day after death.

Ninth day

IN angelic hierarchy nine orders of angels who will be the defenders of the deceased at the Heavenly Court. Angels, like lawyers, ask God to pardon the newly deceased, whose soul has traveled through the afterlife since the day of death.

Fortieth day

According to Orthodox beliefs, on the 40th day, after going through the ordeal and seeing all the horrors and torments that await sinners in hell, the soul appears before God for the third time (the first time on the third day, the second time on the ninth).

It is at this moment that the fate of the soul is decided - where it will have to stay until the moment Last Judgment, in hell or in the Kingdom of Heaven. Therefore, during all forty days one must not cry, but pray earnestly for the soul, for the atonement of the sins of the deceased.

Living people need to go through their Earthly path, not allowing sin: do not kill, do not steal, do not commit adultery, do not have abortions, do not envy... Friends, we are all sinners, but we must remember that for all atrocities the time of reckoning will come.

Message to the late brother

In 2010, my brother Vladimir. A wonderful, kind and believing person. That early morning when the niece reported the tragedy was remembered forever. After the terrible news there was a strong shock, then tears and unbearable mental pain.

My brother Vladimir Mikhailovich Erokhin 1952 - 2010

It was not easy to muster the strength to inform my mother about the death of her son. This cannot be retold. That year she was 90 years old... “Mom, today is a bad morning for us...”. The whole apartment was filled with a heartbreaking scream, then crying and groaning... Those who have lost loved ones and loved ones will understand how difficult it is.

After my brother’s funeral, my mother and I lit a candle every evening and read the prayers “Akathist for the One Who Died.” “Akathist” must be read aloud (prayed) daily for 40 days. And we prayed.

On one of these evenings, I don’t remember which day exactly (the period from the 9th to the 40th), after prayer, I suddenly wrote a note to my deceased brother. I took it Blank sheet paper and pencil. The text was like this: “Vovochka, brother, if you come to us, write us at least some sign…”.

Before going to bed, I left a note on the table in front of my brother’s portrait, and put a pencil on top of the note. The next morning I couldn’t believe my eyes! The sign was left!!! Below the text, three centimeters away, there was a pencil mark in the shape of a comma (5 mm)!

How to explain this fact?! How could a disembodied soul do this? Incredible. I keep this note.

Dear friends, what do you think about this case? Write in the comments to the article “A Note to a Late Brother: A Real Life Case.” Have similar stories happened in your life?

Julius and Ethel Rosenberg. Last letter to sons

Julius and Ethel Rosenberg (USA) were accused of passing on information about atomic bomb Soviet Union. On April 5, 1951, they were sentenced to death penalty, and on June 19 they were executed by electric chair. On the day of their execution, they wrote this letter to their two sons.

Our dear ones, our most precious children, just this morning it seemed to us that we could meet again. But now this is not feasible. And I really want you to know everything that I learned. Unfortunately I can only write a few simple words, everything else should be taught to you by your life, just as mine taught me. At first, of course, you will grieve for us, but you will not be alone. This is what comforts us, and what should ultimately help you. One day you will realize that life is worth living. Know that even now, when our lives are slowly moving towards the end, our convictions are stronger than our executioners! Your life should teach you that good cannot flourish in the heart of evil, that freedom and all those things that make life truly worthwhile and true must sometimes come at a very high price. Know that we calmly accept the fact that civilization has not yet reached the point where life will not have to be sacrificed for the sake of life, and that we are comforted by the firm confidence that others will continue our work. We would like to enjoy life with you. Your father, who remains next to me during these last hours, sends you, our dear boys, all my heart and love. Always remember that we were innocent and could not compromise our conscience. We hold you close and kiss you with all our might. With love, Mom and Dad, Julius and Ethel Rosenberg

Melissa Nathan. Last letter to family

Melissa Nathan was popular English writer. In 2001, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. In April 2006, shortly after her son's third birthday, she died at the age of 37. Her last novel The Learning Curve was published after her death, in August 2006. Knowing that she would never see it published, Melissa used the book's opening pages to say goodbye to her family.

I found myself in unusual situation, knowing that this book will most likely be published after my death. So forgive me for the rather strange introduction. Firstly, I want to thank my wonderful parents. You have given me a life full of love, support and friendship. I was lucky enough to look both of you in the eyes as equals, and at the same time look up to you. Please don't ever think that my life was hard. I've had a great 37 years and I'm grateful to you both for what you've given me. I am happy and at peace with myself. My dear Andrew. I respect you as much as I love you, and that means a lot. If anyone can handle my departure, it's you. After all, you've lived with me for almost 12 years, and it's not that easy. I'm so glad I met you. You were my safe haven, my gentle giant, my best friend, my everything. I wish you a happy life full of love and joy. And you, my beautiful Sammy. I would like to get to know you better, my love, but this will not happen. And yet, despite the fact that you are only three years old, you have already left an imprint on my heart that will remain with me wherever I go. Motherhood has added value to my life. You gave this to me. What can a mother wish for her son? I wish you happiness. You have a wonderful father and a family that adores you. Go into the world knowing that you were my everything and that you won't have to deal with an annoying mom trying to kiss you when you turn 15. I will be in heaven kissing you from afar.

Captain Kuno. Last letter to children

Captain Kuno was a Japanese pilot and kamikaze volunteer who died in May 1945. Before his last flight, he wrote a letter to his children: his son (5 years old) and daughter (2 years old).

Dear Masanori and Kyoko, even though you cannot see me, I will always look at you. Listen to your mother and don't upset her. When you grow up, choose own way and become good Japanese. Don't be jealous that other children have fathers, because I will become a spirit and watch over you both. Study well and help your mother. I can't help you, so be each other best friends. I was an energetic person, I flew a big bomber and killed all the enemies. Please become better than me, this will avenge my death.

Wild Bill Hickok. Last letter to my wife

James Butler Hickok, known as Wild Bill, was a famous marksman and scout in the Old West. On August 2, 1876, he was playing poker. Entered the saloon former hunter to a buffalo named Jack McCall. He shouted “Get it!” and shot Bill point blank. Shortly before this, Bill had a bad feeling and wrote a short Farewell letter to his wife.

Dear Agnes, if it happens that we do not meet again, then with my last shot I will tenderly pronounce the name of my wife - Agnes - and, wishing well even to my enemies, I will dive and try to reach the other shore.

Jacob Vowell. Last letter to family

On May 19, 1902, an explosion occurred in a Tennessee coal mine, killing 216 miners. Some of them survived the explosion and waited for help behind the rubble for some time. Jacob ended up in the mine with his 14-year-old son Elbert. Gasping for breath, he wrote a letter to his wife Ellen and his family.

Ellen, dear, we say goodbye to you. Elbert says the Lord will save him. Take care of our children. We are all praying for air to come out, but we are getting worse. Horace, Elbert says you can wear his shoes and clothes. I'm putting Paul Harmon's watch in the hands of Andy Wood. Ellen, I want you to live well and go to heaven. Little Elbert said he trusted the Lord. It's getting harder to breathe. Dear Ellen, I have left you poor, but I hope the Lord will help you raise my little children. Elbert said that he will meet you all in heaven, that all the children will meet us there. Please take care of them. Oh how I wish I could be with you. Goodbye everything, goodbye. Bury me and Elbert in the same grave as little Eddie. Goodbye Ellen, goodbye Lilly, goodbye Jimmy, goodbye Minnie, goodbye Horace. Oh god, another breath of air. Ellen, remember me while you live. Goodbye, darling. It's 25 minutes after two. Few of us survived. Jake and Elbert.

Ziyad Jarrah. Last letter to the bride

Ziyad Jarrah is a terrorist and one of the masterminds of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack. He was 26 years old when he hijacked United Airlines Flight 93, which crashed into a field in Pennsylvania. On September 10, he wrote a long letter to his fiancée Aysel, who lived in Germany. She never received the letter because she moved. The post office returned it to the United States, where it fell into the hands of the FBI. On the first page of the letter:

I don't want you to be sad. I still live somewhere, although you cannot see or hear me, but I will see you and know what is wrong with you. And I will wait until you come to me. Everyone has their own time and everyone will leave one day. It is my fault that I made you hope for a wedding, marriage, children and a family... You should be proud of me, because this is a matter of honor, and you will see that everyone will be happy as a result... I did what I had to do.

Remember who you are and what is worthy of you. I hug you and kiss your hands and head. I thank you and apologize for the wonderful and difficult 5 years that you spent with me. Your patience... Allah... I am your prince and I will take you away. Goodbye! Yours forever.

Captain Robert Scott. Last letter to my wife

British Royal Navy captain and Antarctic explorer Robert Falcon Scott was returning from South Pole. Buran locked the expedition members in a tent; they suffered from hunger and cold. Scott was the last to die, having written a letter to his wife Caitlin.

To my widow Dear, beloved. It’s not easy for me to write because of the cold - 70 degrees below zero and only a tent for protection... We are at a dead end, and I’m not sure that we can cope. During a short breakfast, I take advantage of the small amount of warmth to write letters in preparation for my eventual demise. If anything were to happen to me, I would want you to know how much you meant to me. I have to write a letter to the boy, I hope when he grows up he will have time to read it. Honey, you know I don't like sentimental nonsense about remarriage. When a worthy man appears in your life, you should become happy again. Get your son interested in science if you can. It's better than games. Try to teach him faith in God, it consoles him. Oh my darling, my darling, how I dreamed of his future. And yet, my girl, I know that you can handle it. Your portraits will be found on my chest. I could tell you a lot about this journey. What stories could you tell our boy, but, oh, at what cost. Lose the opportunity to see your darling, cute face. I think there is no chance. We decided not to kill ourselves and fight to the end to get to the camp. Death in wrestling is painless, so don't worry about me.

Milada Gorakova. Last letter to family

Milada Horáková was a Czech politician and member of parliament. After the communists came to power, on September 27, 1949, Milada was accused of “preparing a sabotage plot.” She did not admit her guilt, was sentenced to death and hanged. Before her execution, she was allowed to write three letters: to her husband, 6-year-old daughter and mother-in-law. This is what she wrote to her child:

It's not that I love you too little, I love you as purely and passionately as other mothers love their children. But I understand that my task in this world was to... ensure that life was better and that all children could live better... Don't be afraid or sad because I won't come back anymore. My child, learn to look at life seriously as early as possible. Life is hard, it doesn’t caress anyone, but don’t let it defeat you. Choose to fight.

Sullivan Ballou. Last letter to my wife

This letter was written in 1861, a week before Major Sullivan Ballou of the 2nd Rhode Island Volunteers was killed at the Battle of Bull Run, the first major American land battle. civil war.

Dear Sarah! Everything suggests that we will hit the road soon, perhaps tomorrow. And since I will not be able to write to you, I feel that I must leave a few lines that may catch your eye while I am away. I have no doubts or distrust of the purpose for which we are fighting, and my courage has not dried up or diminished. I know that American civilization rests on the success of our government, and I know that we are indebted to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I wish, I sincerely wish, to leave the joys of life in order to support this government and pay off this debt. Sarah, my love for you is undying. She seems to bind me with chains that only providence can break. But still, my love for the Motherland is higher than me, it is like a strong wind that carries me with all these shackles to the battlefield. The memories of all the amazing moments I experienced with you overwhelm me and I am deeply grateful to God and you for enjoying them for so long. How hard it is for me now to leave them and burn to the ground hopes and future years, when, by the will of God, we could live and love further and see how our boys grow up worthy men Next to us. If I don't come back, my dear Sarah, never forget how I loved you, and that when my last breath escaped, it sounded your name… Forgive me for my sins and the pain I caused you. How thoughtless and stupid I was sometimes!.. But, Sarah, if the dead can return to this earth and hover invisible next to those they love, I will always be with you. And on the brightest day, and the most dark night… always always. And when the light wind touches your cheeks, it will be my breath, and when the cool air refreshes your forehead, know that it is my spirit that has flown by. Sarah, don't mourn for me - believe that I just left and wait for me, because we will meet again.

Mary, Queen of Scots. Last letter to Henry III, King of France

Mary Stuart, arrested on Elizabeth's orders, was sentenced to death for her participation in a conspiracy against the queen. On the morning of February 8, 1587, 6 hours before her execution, Mary wrote last letter to her late husband's brother, the king Henry III. In the message, she claimed that she was being punished only for her faith and for her right to the English throne, and also asked Henry to take care of her servants - when she was executed, they would be left without a livelihood. Her last letter ended like this:

I took the liberty of sending you two precious stones, a talisman against illness, hoping that you will live in good health for a long time and happy life. Accept them from your loving sister-in-law, who, as death approaches, testifies to her warm feelings for you. If it pleases you, give orders that for the sake of the salvation of my soul, everything that I bequeathed should be paid, and that, in the name of Jesus Christ, to whom I pray for you before I die, enough will remain so that a memorial service will be held for me and They gave, as is customary, alms to the poor. On Tuesday at two o'clock in the morning. Your most sensitive and devoted sister.

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