What a short story. Short stories for the soul - small emotional stories with meaning

Hemingway once bet that he would write a six-word story (in the original language) that would be the most moving ever written. And he won the argument.

1. “Children's shoes for sale. Not worn."
(“For sale: baby shoes, never used.”)
2. The winner of the competition for the shortest story that has a beginning, climax and denouement. (O.Henry)
“The driver lit a cigarette and bent over the gas tank to see how much gasoline was left. The deceased was twenty-three years old."
3. Frederick Brown. The shortest scary story ever written.
“The last man on Earth was sitting in a room. There was a knock on the door."
4. A competition was held in Great Britain for the shortest story.
The parameters were as follows:
- God must be mentioned,
- Queen,
- There should be some sex
and there is some mystery present.
Winner story:
- God! - cried the queen, - I’m pregnant, and it’s unknown from whom!...
5. An elderly French woman won the competition for the shortest autobiography and wrote:
“I used to have a smooth face and a wrinkled skirt, but now it’s the other way around.”

Here are a few more of the most short stories in the world, up to 55 words. Read for your health.

Jane Orvis
Window

Ever since Rita was brutally murdered, Carter has been sitting by the window.
No TV, reading, correspondence. His life is what is seen through the curtains.
He doesn't care who brings the food, who pays the bills, he doesn't leave the room.
His life is passing athletes, the change of seasons, passing cars, the ghost of Rita.
Carter doesn't realize that the felt-lined chambers have no windows.

Larisa Kirkland
Offer

Starlight Night. It's the right time. Romantic dinner. Cozy Italian restaurant. Small black dress. Luxurious hair, sparkling eyes, silvery laughter. We've been together for two years. Wonderful time! Real love, best friend, no one else. Champagne! I offer my hand and heart. On one knee. Are people watching? Well, let! Beautiful diamond ring. Blush on the cheeks, charming smile.
How, no?!

Charles Enright
Ghost

As soon as this happened, I hurried home to tell my wife the sad news. But she didn't seem to listen to me at all. She didn't notice me at all. She looked right through me and poured herself a drink. She turned on the TV.
At that moment there was a phone call. She walked over and picked up the phone.
I saw her face wrinkle. She cried bitterly.

Andrew E. Hunt
Gratitude

The wool blanket he'd recently been given from a charity felt comfortable around his shoulders, and the boots he'd found in the trash today didn't sting at all.
The street lights warmed the soul so pleasantly after all this chilling darkness...
The curve of the park bench seemed so familiar to his weary old back.
“Thank you, Lord,” he thought, “life is simply amazing!”

Brian Newell
What the devil wants

The two boys stood and watched Satan slowly walk away. The sparkle of his hypnotic eyes still clouded their heads.
- Listen, what did he want from you?
- My soul. And from you?
- A coin for a pay phone. He urgently needed to call.
- Do you want us to go eat?
- I want to, but now I have no money at all.
- It's OK. I have plenty.

Alan E. Mayer
Bad luck

I woke up with severe pain throughout my body. I opened my eyes and saw a nurse standing by my bed.
“Mr. Fujima,” she said, “you were lucky to survive the bombing of Hiroshima two days ago.” But now you are in the hospital, you are no longer in danger.
A little alive from weakness, I asked:
- Where I am?
“To Nagasaki,” she answered.

Jay Rip
Fate

There was only one way out, for our lives were intertwined in too tangled a knot of anger and bliss to solve everything any other way. Let's trust the lot: heads - and we will get married, tails - and we will part forever.
The coin was tossed. She tinkled, spun and stopped. Eagle.
We stared at her in bewilderment.
Then, with one voice, we said, “Maybe one more time?”

Robert Tompkins
In Search of Truth

Finally, in this remote, secluded village, his search ended. Truth sat in a dilapidated hut by the fire.
He had never seen an older, uglier woman.
- You - Really?
The old, wizened hag nodded solemnly.
- Tell me, what should I tell the world? What message to convey?
The old woman spat into the fire and answered:
- Tell them that I am young and beautiful!

August Salemi
Modern medicine

Blinding headlights, a deafening grinding sound, piercing pain, absolute pain, then a warm, inviting, pure blue light. John felt amazingly happy, young, free, he moved towards the radiant radiance.
The pain and darkness slowly returned. John slowly, with difficulty, opened his swollen eyes. Bandages, some tubes, plaster. Both legs were gone. Tearful wife.
- You were saved, dear!

As we see the shortest and most interesting stories in the world are distinguished by brevity and extraordinary depth of thoughts - the authors skillfully fit into the shortest stories unprecedented content and the most interesting stories turn out to be extremely attractive to readers.

Interesting short funny stories from people’s lives are exactly what will always be in demand among readers. Any person loves to laugh at what happened in the life of another. Funny stories can cheer you up at any time of the day. It is known that what was taken from life will be fun for many years to come. And laughter, as you know, prolongs life!

Holidays with friends already involve stories of all sorts funny stories. Many of these gatherings end up on the Internet. If you want to read a collection of very funny life stories, welcome to our website!

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Short stories- a genre in literature that requires special skill and talent of the author. Sometimes 55 words are enough to convey the meaning and idea. This is incredibly small, but it is enough to think about what sometimes seems insignificant and unimportant to us. A short story is the story of one life, one tragedy, one fate.

One day, New Time magazine held an event in which participants were asked to write a story no more than 55 words long. The action caused an incredible response among readers.

The result of this action was a collection called “The World’s Shortest Stories.” The genre of short stories captivated not only the readers of New Time magazine, but also the best representatives of the literary community. So, for example, Hemingway once won an argument by writing a story that could touch anyone and consisted of only 4 words:

“Children's shoes for sale. Unworn."

Some believe that any story should contain three traditional components: beginning, climax and denouement. Master of the story O. Henry won the competition by writing his short story, taking into account these requirements:

“The driver lit a cigarette and bent over the gas tank to see how much gasoline was left. The deceased was twenty-three years old.”

American science fiction writer and master detective genre Frederick Brown managed to write the shortest of horror stories:

“The last man on Earth was sitting in a room. There was a knock on the door..."

But you don't have to be a recognized literary genius to write short stories. For example, an elderly French woman won a competition by writing the shortest autobiography:

“I used to have a smooth face and a wrinkled skirt, but now it’s the other way around.”

TOP 20 SHORT STORIES.

"What the Devil Wants"

The two boys stood and watched Satan slowly walk away. The sparkle of his hypnotic eyes still clouded their heads.

Listen, what did he want from you?

My soul. And from you?

A coin for a pay phone. He urgently needed to call.

Do you want us to go eat?

I want to, but now I have no money at all.

It's OK. I have plenty.

Brian Newell.

"Higher education"

In college, we just wiped our pants down,” Jennings said, washing his dirty hands.

After all these budget cuts they don't teach you much, they just made estimates and things went on as usual.

So how did you study?

But we didn’t study. However, you can watch me work.

The nurse opened the door.

Dr. Jennings, you're needed in the operating room.

Ron Bast.

"Gratitude"

The wool blanket he'd recently been given from a charity felt comfortable around his shoulders, and the boots he'd found in the trash today didn't sting at all. The street lights warmed his soul so pleasantly after all this chilling darkness... The curve of the park bench seemed so familiar to his tired old back. “Thank you, Lord,” he thought, “life is simply amazing!”

Andrew E. Hunt.

"Rendezvous"

The phone rang.

Hello,” she whispered.

Victoria, it's me. Let's meet at the pier at midnight.

OK, darling.

And please don’t forget to take a bottle of champagne with you,” he said.

I won't forget, dear. I want to be with you tonight.

Hurry up, I have no time to wait! - he said and hung up.

She sighed, then smiled.

I wonder who it is,” she said.

Nicole Weddle.

"Bed Story"

Watch out baby, it's loaded,” he said as he walked back into the bedroom.

Her back rested on the headboard of the bed.

Is this for your wife?

No. It would be risky. I'll hire a hitman.

What if the killer is me?

He grinned.

Who is smart enough to hire a woman to kill a man?

She licked her lips and aimed her sights at him.

Your wife's.

Geoffrey Whitmore.

"Unfortunate"

They say evil has no face. Indeed, no feelings were reflected on his face. There was not a glimmer of sympathy on him, but the pain was simply unbearable. Can't he see the horror in my eyes and the panic on my face? He calmly, one might say, carried out his dirty work professionally, and at the end he politely said: “Rinse your mouth, please.”

Dan Andrews.

"The Decisive Moment"

She could almost hear the doors of her prison slamming shut. Freedom is gone forever, now her fate is in someone else’s hands, and she will never see freedom. Crazy thoughts flashed through her head about how nice it would be to fly far, far away. But she knew that it was impossible to hide. She turned to the groom with a smile and repeated: “Yes, I agree.”

Tina Milburn.

"Start"

She was angry with him. In their idyllic life, they had almost everything, but she longed for one thing - something they never had. Only his cowardice was a hindrance. Then it will be necessary to get rid of it, but it’s too early. It's better to be calm and cunning. Beautiful in her nakedness, she grabbed the fruit. “Adam,” she called quietly.

Enrique Cavalitto.

"In the hospital"

She drove the car at breakneck speed. Lord, if only I could make it on time.

But from the expression on the face of the doctor from the intensive care unit, she understood everything. She began to sob.

Is he conscious? “Mrs. Allerton,” the doctor said softly, “you should be happy.”

His last words were: “I love you, Mary.” She looked at the doctor and turned away.

“Thank you,” Judith said coldly.

Barnaby Conrades.

"Hide and Seek"

Ninety-nine, one hundred! Ready or not, here I come! I hate driving, but for me it's much easier than hiding. Entering a dark room, I whisper to those who are hiding inside: “They hit and hit!” They follow me along the long corridor with their eyes, and in the mirrors hanging on the walls my figure in a black cassock and with a scythe in his hands is reflected.

Kurt Homan.

"Fate"

There was only one way out, for our lives were intertwined in too tangled a knot of anger and bliss to solve everything any other way. Let's trust the lot: heads - and we will get married, tails - and we will part forever. The coin was tossed. She tinkled, spun and stopped. Eagle. We stared at her in bewilderment. Then, with one voice, we said, “Maybe one more time?”

Jay Rip.

"Evening Surprise"

Shiny tights hugged her beautiful hips tightly and seductively - a wonderful addition to light evening dress. From the very tips of the diamond earrings to the toes of the elegant shoes with thin stiletto heels, everything was simply chic. Eyes with freshly applied shadows examined the reflection in the mirror, and lips painted with bright red lipstick stretched with pleasure. Suddenly I heard from behind child's voice: "Dad?!"

Hillary Clay.

"Window"

Ever since Rita was brutally murdered, Carter has been sitting by the window. No TV, reading, correspondence. His life is what is seen through the curtains. He doesn't care who brings the food, who pays the bills, he doesn't leave the room. His life is passing athletes, the change of seasons, passing cars, the ghost of Rita. Carter doesn't realize that the felt-lined chambers have no windows.

Jane Orvey.

"It was a year ago"

Flowed by a light breeze, Doug stood and looked at Joey.

Hey Joey! - said Doug.

There was silence all around.

I'm sorry, Joey. I did not want. Honestly. Happy New Year, Joey!

Doug placed a rose on Joey's grave and slowly walked away.

Will you ever forgive me for driving drunk that night? - he asked.

Grace Kagimbaga.

"In the garden"

She was standing in the garden when she saw him running towards her.

Tina! My little flower! Love of my life!

He finally said it.

Tina, my flower!

Oh Tom, I love you too!

Tom approached her, knelt down and quickly pushed her aside.

My flower! You stepped on my favorite rose!

Hope Hey Torres.

"In Search of Truth"

Finally, in this remote, secluded village, his search ended. Truth sat in a dilapidated hut by the fire. He had never seen an older, uglier woman.

Are you - Really?

The old, wizened hag nodded solemnly.

Tell me, what should I tell the world? What message to convey?

The old woman spat into the fire and answered:

Tell them I'm young and beautiful!

Robert Tompkins.

"Bad luck"

I woke up with severe pain throughout my body. I opened my eyes and saw a nurse standing by my bed.

Mr. Fujima, she said, you were lucky to survive the bombing of Hiroshima two days ago. But now you are in the hospital, you are no longer in danger.

A little alive from weakness, I asked:

“To Nagasaki,” she answered.

Alan E. Mayer.

"Trial"

She hated them! All of them! Their masks did not hide their joy as their lustful hands pressed her down so that he could have his way with her. The pain was unbearable. But he did not stop, he continued to perform this monstrous ritual over her. Her screams only encouraged him. She knew that if she did not give in, death would be inevitable. Finally, satisfied, he said, “Boy.”

Tom McGrane.

"Ghost"

As soon as this happened, I hurried home to tell my wife the sad news. But she didn't seem to listen to me at all. She didn't notice me at all. She looked right through me and poured herself a drink. She turned on the TV. At that moment the phone rang. She walked over and picked up the phone. I saw her face wrinkle. She cried bitterly.

Charles Enright.

"Offer"

Starlight Night. It's the right time. Romantic dinner. Cozy Italian restaurant. Little black dress. Luxurious hair, sparkling eyes, silvery laughter. We've been together for two years. Wonderful time! True love, best friend, no one else. Champagne! I offer my hand and heart. On one knee. Are people watching? Well, let!

Beautiful diamond ring. Blush on the cheeks, charming smile. How, no?!

Larisa Kirkland.

Katerina Goltsman

A girl with a very sad and thoughtful face is sitting on a bench. The young people passing by obviously decided to get acquainted:
- Young woman! You have probably never been more beautiful in your life than you are today!
The girl, without raising her eyes, says thoughtfully and sadly:
- Yes, and menstruation until today were regular...

Timely help

In the past, there was a toilet on the territory of the military department of Moscow State University. And there were two fire extinguishers hanging in that toilet. One near entrance doors, the second one is directly above the toilet. One major came and sat down in a big way. Having finished his business, he gets up from the toilet and touches the fire extinguisher, which hangs directly above the toilet, with his shoulder. The fire extinguisher falls and goes off. What should the poor major do? He holds his pants with one hand, and with the other he grabbed a fire extinguisher and directed the stream into the toilet. And he squeals with good obscenities: “Help-and-those!!” The colonel comes running when he shouts and sees this terrible picture, grabs a second fire extinguisher from the wall, turns it on and directs the stream into the toilet.

"Don't come... the office is gone"

A friend of mine comes home and they say to him:
- You are urgently called to work. Something happened to you there.
He, of course, is getting ready, and just as he was about to tie his tie, the pager beeped. The guy looks, and there is a message: “Zhenya, there is no office. You don’t have to come.” He almost had a heart attack.

As it turned out later, there were minor troubles with one of the clients at work. And the message on the pager was sent by his friend, whom he asked to install Microsoft Office on his computer.

...

Moscow. Winter. Snow. A boy plays football. Suddenly the sound of broken glass. A janitor, a stern Russian janitor, runs out with a broom and chases after the boy. The boy runs and thinks: “Why, why all this!? Why all this image of a street boy, all this football, all these friends!? Why??? I’ve already done all my homework, why don’t I sit at home on the couch and read books your favorite writer Ernest Hemingway?

Havana. Ernest Hemingway is finishing another novel and thinking: “Why, why all this? How tired of everything, all this Cuba, these bananas, this cane, this heat, these Cubans!!! Why am I not in Paris, not sitting with my friend Andre Maurois in the company of beautiful courtesans, drinking your morning aperitif and talking about the meaning of life?

Paris. Andre Maurois, stroking the thigh of a beautiful courtesan and drinking his morning aperitif, thinks: “Why, why do I need all this? How tired I am of this Paris, these rude French, dirty Moroccans, these stupid courtesans, this Eiffel Tower, from which they spit on your head !!! Why am I not in Russia, not in Moscow, where it’s cold, snowy, not sitting with my best friend Andrei Platonov, not talking about the meaning of life??"

Moscow. Cold. Snow. Andrey Platonov. Wearing earflaps. With a broom. He chases the boy and thinks: “Damn, if I catch up, I’ll fucking kill him!”

Organs however!

Brain: One-two! One-two! Feet - let's go, Eyes - look, Ears - listen!
Ears: What?
Brain: Nothing. Listen, let's go.
Ears: And so we are.
Eyes: Look, look! Which girl is coming!
Brain: Really? Look! Legs!
Legs: What?
Brain: Nothing!!! Well, quickly - head for that chick over there!
Legs: Yes, sir!
Brain: That’s better.
Eyes: What a butt...
Member: Really? Hmmm...Listen, Brain, give me some blood.
Brain: You need it yourself. I'll think about how to approach her.
Member: Come on, okay?
Brain: I haven’t met her yet, and you’re already awake!
Member: Yes, I am!
Brain: Shut up. So, I think. I.. d..u..m..a..yu.. I.. M..o..z..g.. MEMBER!!! LEAVE!!!
Member: Sorry, boss...
Brain: Eyes, where is she?
Eyes: We've already caught up.
Brain: Legs, are you crazy?? I haven’t thought of a speech yet!!
Legs: As long as you think, you can die. We are going.
Mouth: Brain, think of something to say?
Brain: uh... Well, (no, not that) you can... uh.. (no, it won’t work) hmmm...
Mouth: uh... Girl!... Can I... uh.... with you... uh... Uh?
Ears: Asks again. I don’t understand, it seems.
Eyes: But she turned around! Wow, what tits!
Ruki: Let me touch it!
Member: That's what I understand. Come on, dear ones, be bolder.
Brain: Everyone calm down!!! Be equal!! Attention!! Leave it!! Muzzle, why is it so red??
Face: I'm not a Muzzle, I'm a Face.
Brain: Talk to me! I ask red what?
Face: So this... The member said they give blood for free.
Eyes: She's waiting for us to say. Brain! Work, don't sleep!!
Brain: Hey, Mouth, ask how many degrees below zero it is now.
Mouth: Fell from the oak tree?
Brain: Do it!!!
Mouth: uh... Girl... uh... what time... is it... uh... time?... Uh.
Brain: Idiot... God, what an idiot. Okay... Ears, what is she answering there?...
Ears: What?
Brain: What?
Mouth: What? ...
Ears: He says it’s half past six.
Member: WHAT???? Yes, for such words...
Brain: Calm down. Let me see...
Eyes: She's leaving...
Brain: Where? Stand! Well my...
Eyes: But still, what an ass!
Member: You're a fool, brother Brain.
Roth: eh...
Ruki: As always, the matter did not reach us.
Brain: Okay, we'll show ourselves later. Let's go grab a beer.
Member: ! What a freak you are! You'll make me so impotent. Such a chick! missed..
Brain: Shut up, hose. You will find work today even without a girl.
Member: Well, yes, of course. How to pick up a chick, it's crap, but how to piss, I'll take the rap. Listen, while you’re sober, tell your Hands to shake it off better. Damn Casanova...

...

It was in Vorkuta. Miners from one of the mines go to the bus stop after their shift. A bus is arriving. The whole crowd (there are really a lot of people) is breaking into this unfortunate bus. The conductor (an elderly woman), trying to somehow control the filling of the bus, says: “Stand in a herringbone pattern” - more people will fit!” And he explains that “herringbone” is not, as usual, people standing in transport shoulder to shoulder, but as if half-turned, something like this //////. And then a gloomy, tired voice from the crowd: “We can’t” Christmas tree!" “Why is this?” the conductor wonders. “But because the “bumps” are in the way!” answers the same gloomy voice. The bus almost exploded with laughter.

...

At a university at the Faculty of Law, a professor asks a student: - If you want to treat someone with an orange, how will you do it?
“I’ll say: ‘Please help yourself!’,” the student answered.
- No no! - the professor shouted. - Think like a lawyer!
“Okay,” answered the student. - I will say: “I hereby assign to you all rights, claims, benefits and other interests in the property called the orange, together with all its peel, pulp, juice and seeds, with the right to squeeze, cut, freeze and otherwise use, using for this purpose, any kind of device, both currently existing and invented later, or without the use of said devices, as well as transfer previously named property to third parties with or without peel, pulp, juice and seeds..."

...

My friend Ivan teaches taekwondo to children at school. One day, before training, he enters the gym and sees that it is even dirtier than usual. “I should sweep it a little, at least where I’ll be standing,” Ivan thought, put his bag on the bench and went to the utility room for a dustpan and mop. He returns and sees some guy rummaging through his things. Just at that moment he pulled out a black belt from his bag and looked at it with increasingly rounded eyes. After that, the man turned around... Ivan threw away the dustpan and grabbed the mop more comfortably, taking the second position to fight with the staff. The man thought quickly: - That's it, dude, I understand everything, there is no market! With these words, he thrust a hundred-ruble note into Ivan’s hand and asked for a shout.

...

Gas station and a small shop next to it. The driver gets out of the car and asks from the threshold of the store:
- Are there seals?
He looks around the store and sees only me, buying Coca-Cola, and the saleswoman, who is clearly seeing not only a gas station, but also a cash register for the second time in her life. Seeing who he was addressing, he repeated the question, but quieter:
- I say, do you have oil seals here? - and glances around the entire store.
The saleswoman frowned and looked up from cash register, and said sternly:
- The toilet is right there. But we don’t have urinals, whatever you call them!

...

To a lecture on philosophy, the professor brought a large glass jar, filled it with golf balls and asked the students if it was full.
The students replied that it was full.
Then the professor added pebbles to the jar and shook it so that the pebbles filled the space between the golf balls.
- Is it full now? - he asked.
“Yes,” the students answered.
Then the professor added river sand to the jar, which filled the remaining space. The jar was full again. After that, the professor took out two cans of beer and poured it into the jar.
- And now it’s full?
The students agreed with a laugh and asked what it all meant.
- The bank is our life. Golf balls represent important big things (love, health, family, home) with which we fill our lives. Pebbles mean less important things (car, Appliances, jewelry), also filling our lives. And sand is the little things that happen in our lives.
- Please note that if we first start filling our lives with all sorts of small, unimportant things and affairs, then there will be no room in it for large and important things. Always deal with the important things in life first, and only then the small ones that mean little to you.
- What does beer mean? - asked one of the students.
- This means that no matter how full your life is, there will always be a place and time in it for a couple of cans of beer.

My job required me to take a polygraph test. I was very worried and at the same time curious. Two conclusions: if at the beginning they tell you: “Breathe calmly,” then you will not be able to breathe calmly for the entire session (~2 hours); The polygraph is not an accurate machine. I was re-tested several times for drugs, when in reality I have nothing to do with them at all, not even cigarettes, but the polygraph was still triggered by these questions. And you had to explain that you are not a deer.

I have ugly hands. I have been haunted by this complex all my life. Short and thick fingers, small nail plate. How I envy people who are lucky with their hands! When you can, without hesitation, try on rings, gracefully shake hands, do beautiful manicure... Even my nail extensions look terrible! I am always embarrassed to take something from people and show my hands in company. It seems to me that ugly hands are the same thing as ugly face- also spoils a person (

I can't break the habit of masturbating with my boyfriend's electric toothbrush. The thought that he then brushes his teeth with it is exciting.

When I was about five years old, my grandmother often came and sat with us while my parents worked. And she had a tradition: once a week she would bring a new issue of the Crime newspaper and read it aloud to us before bed. I still remember all sorts of horror stories in detail about maniacs and pedophiles.

I woke up in the morning and realized that I needed to change something in my life. I changed the bed linen and went back to bed. It's a shame that this is where all the planned changes end.

I'm a Veterinarian. Once a woman came to me with a parrot and said that something was wrong with it. I wanted to explain that I am not an ornithologist and do not study parrots. Screaming, she threw the cage with the parrot into the wall and left. I was very scared, picked up the cage and took it to the ornithologist. Fortunately, everything was fine with the parrot, he was just very scared. I took him in with me, and now I have a friend, Yasha. He turned out to be very friendly and affectionate. I recently started talking. I love him very much, we will soon buy him a girlfriend :)

One day I was walking around the city with my one-year-old daughter and went to jump on the trampolines. Soon the groom appeared three years old, looked after my daughter, carried cookies, gave her juice. Then he takes her hand, leads her to his parents, says: “This is mom, this is dad,” he turns to her. “Who are you?” My daughter stands, blinks her eyes, we all laugh. The boy was not taken aback: “What? You don’t know your name? Poor thing! Then I’ll call you Lenin. Grandma says he was good.” We still sometimes call it that))

The husband is very clean, and he always smells of fragrant shower gels and perfume. And then during the night the car often started and ran out of gas. He was running to a gas station and accidentally doused himself with gasoline. When I came home, my legs gave way under me! How I missed the smell of a working man... I attacked him, but he quickly ran away and rushed to the bathroom to wash his clothes. All desire is gone.

I am an extremely tactful and empathic person. Correctly comforting a friend, cheering up a colleague, praising a child, not disturbing the elderly - all this is about me. But not when it comes to love and romantic relationships! I'm kind of mentally retarded in this regard. "Yy" and "uh". I can blurt out something on a date that makes it the last (which happened in my life). It’s as if I came to a symposium on the problems of the Russian language and said: “OK, guys, let’s hype a little!”

I recently saw a picture from a balcony: a drunk guy who had just returned from the army got to the bottom of an unfortunate homeless man with the question: “Where did you serve?” To which the homeless man, without hesitation, replied: “In the homeless division”)

I’m a big workaholic and an activist, but if I become lazy for at least a couple of days, lounging at home watching TV shows and pizza, then I can’t be stopped, and my laziness can drag on for several months until I force myself to get out of bed. So one day I overslept my plane to the Maldives, I planned and saved for a very long time...

Some people have fur all over their apartment because of cats, others because of dogs. And for me because of the carpet! I got it from my ancestors, and I love it very much, but Last year he just sheds catastrophically! His fur is everywhere, and it’s also red... I love my carpet very much, but I don’t want to live covered in wool either.

The other day I came across the city's telephone directory, a healthy Talmud, more than a thousand pages. And I sat like a child, looking for surnames like Sukina, Kherova... there are no such names in our city. There are Durasovs, Durovs, a bunch of Vagins, Pork and the first one starting with the letter I - Jaanus. I think Pavel Leonidovich was unlucky. He is the anus.

As a child, I had a neighbor who was the same age. We often ran to visit each other. Usually we just played together, but on Sundays her dad came, and our get-togethers became a real holiday. The cheerful mustachioed man always came up with Interesting games and brought a bunch of sweets and gifts. Returning home, upset, I asked my mother why we couldn’t have it like this. Thus, at a time when many children dreamed of a father, I dreamed of my parents getting divorced)

When I was 14 ( teenage problems+ really difficult situation in the family), I was on the verge of depression. There are no friends, no one understands, life is not a success. And suddenly I accidentally met a boy from an orphanage three years older than me. We communicated with him very rarely, but literally after a couple of conversations with him, my condition improved a thousand times. He always appeared next to me only when it was really hard for me. So kind, so dear person, everyone around him loved him very much. He was just telling me how hard it was for him a couple of years ago, and how happy he is now. And I realized that there is no point in worrying about something if in a couple of years it won’t matter to you. I’ve lost contact with the boy, we don’t communicate, but I’m incredibly grateful to him and will remember him for the rest of my life. Now, I'm sure he's helping someone else.

His best friend introduced me to my husband. This friend is a womanizer, he had so many beautiful girls. And then one day he starts asking me for the phone number of a girl - my neighbor. I am an accountant for a housing cooperative, so I have contact information for all the residents. The girl is so-so - a gray mouse, it would seem that after all those princesses nothing will shine for her, I feel sorry for her, I think she will fuck her up and leave her. After much persuasion, I took pity and gave him my number. Result: wedding, daughter is already five years old, they adore each other.

My ex-lover decided to ruin my life. Hiding behind the guise of other people, he posted a photo of me with the caption “whore” with his first and last name and, like an adult man, closed all his profiles. I didn’t do anything wrong, I just didn’t want to meet again.

My problem is my age. I'm 21. I can't be promoted at work because there are legal requirements for positions held. But I don’t have a tower yet, I don’t have three years of experience in this field. I cannot calmly and openly say that I am married. After all, if you are married at 21, then only by chance. I can't buy a car, because you're 21 - you're just a child. The result is this: the infantes created their own cult and popularized it so much that now, if you are thirty and watch cartoons, it is more normal and socially correct.

Three years ago, my sister and her husband died in an accident, leaving behind a five-year-old niece. My parents began to press me to take custody of the girl, and at the same time I received a grant for two years of study at a foreign university, which I sought whole year, it was not easy to win. Naturally, it was out of the question for me to miss such a chance, because I had the opportunity to go abroad and stay there to live, and eventually work. The niece was sent to Orphanage- My mother is on disability, my father was sick, and my sisters on my husband’s side all died. For my relatives, I am now enemy number one, but I surprisingly don’t care about it. I have already completed my studies, received my degree and am working where I dreamed of. I wouldn't make any other choice. Alas, and oh, this is my life and I was not going to sacrifice it for someone else.

I'm a fatalist. During her life she survived the unsurvivable seven times. I easily risk my life and don’t take care of it, because I believe that if my body has survived seven damn times, not to mention a bunch of times on the brink, then I’m obviously needed for some reason.

My boyfriend's parents are very rich people. But they don't give him money and don't expensive gifts with the words: “Achieve everything yourself!” That's what he said. But as I heard from his conversation with an old friend from “that rich life", this is because he is dating me, and I am not their equal. I love him madly! But I see how tired he is of working, and how he wants to return to his parents and their money. It seems that our hut is collapsing.

Once, in a subway passage, a guy came up and asked me to walk hand in hand with my ex. At that moment, my self-esteem rose significantly, I was already imagining the upcoming continuation of our acquaintance, but after the girl disappeared from the horizon, the young man also disappeared, as did my phone number.

My grandmother is 80 years old. Lives in multi-storey building on the ninth floor. Recently moved to the floor above new neighbor- such a lady of about 30 years old. One day she comes to my grandmother and says: “I, of course, apologize, but you are walking on the ceiling too loudly.” My grandmother, not at a loss, answered: “When I was young, I lifted weights, but my knees no longer allow me to walk on the ceiling.” The lady was taken aback, muttered something and disappeared.

I have a colleague who talked like I was talking to my mother. She knew everything. She's 50, I'm 30; divorce, new relationship. Recently she covered her ass with me in front of the general. I freaked out, told her, they stopped communicating. I recently saw her with the “same” girl like me. I thought about it. I realized that I knew almost every personal life of my colleagues - who slept with whom, gave birth to whom, what illnesses she had, etc. Everything about those with whom she was once friends. Apparently, my personal life has now become public! What a fool I am(

I needed to move furniture and I turned to a moving company. We were discussing the details with the logistician on the phone, when suddenly I heard strange sounds and realized with horror that it was the gurgling of feeding poop followed by the rustling of paper. Doubts were dispelled by the sound of flushing. In awe, I simply said: “Don’t forget to wash your hands.” I found another company with less relaxed employees.

I have often heard that many men would be happy if they had not one, but two girls nearby. In words, everyone is such an alpha male! I'm a girl, I have a girlfriend. We have been together for a long time and have thought more than once that it would be nice if a man were with us. Not just in terms of sex. We both work, there is no need to provide for us. Nobody is going to share it. But I have not yet met a single man who would be happy about this. Where are you, vaunted males who want to have a harem? Everyone runs away with their eyes wide in fear...

I'm paranoid about teeth. It so happened that I wore braces for more than five years, and when they were removed, it started. I brush my teeth in the morning, evening and after every meal. I brush for 10-15 minutes with three different brushes. I brush until blood oozes from each gum. I know that this is impossible, but I can’t help it. I'm afraid that because of this quirk I will soon lose my smile, because some of my teeth have already begun to wobble...

My husband and I lived in St. Petersburg at the same time. We moved from one apartment to another (10 minutes walk). All things were transported, only one empty suitcase remained. I followed him. It’s summer, it’s warm, I’m rocking this empty suitcase. And then the old woman walking towards me stops and loudly rumbles: “Where? Back? Home? To Orenburg?!” She shook her head disapprovingly and moved on. If she had confused me with someone, she would have called me by name, asked what happened... Why Orenburg at all? I'm from Ekaterinburg...

I have depression, I am working with a therapist. He explained why it was necessary to break off a long-stagnant relationship with a guy. I tried to be as gentle as possible when parting. The ex-boyfriend was already OFFEN that I wanted to break up with him, and he no longer writes.

I’ve been living in Germany for a year now and when I start to miss hometown(I’m from the Baltic states), I just go on Sunday to the only store that is open that day throughout the city. Since this is the central station, all the cream of society gather here. The crush, the running, the queues - everything we love. After such an adventure I remember how much I hate people.