You Caucasians are kind of aggressive. Why are Caucasians hot-tempered? inside view

The question of the existence of love excites the minds of millions. Of course, most people think that real love there is, because everyone has experienced it. Moreover, it can be seen. It is clearly visible in the eyes of lovers. The fire of passion and desire envelops the hearts of lovers, making them beat faster. So does true love exist, you ask. Everyone must find this answer for themselves.

Is there love at first sight?

Love only happens at first sight. It only takes thirty seconds for a person to fall in love. This fact has been confirmed by scientists. During this time, you can easily have time to evaluate the appearance (figure, height, hair color...) and mentality of a person of the opposite sex. Many may object by saying that they knew their partner for several years and only then fell in love with each other. And this fact has an explanation. Our brain is constantly playing tricks on us. You simply might not be ready for this relationship or involved in others. Only when the consciousness fully processes the information embedded in the subconscious that you like this person, only then is it possible to develop relationships and, of course, fall in love. That is why it can be argued that all love happens at first sight, and manifests itself only when a person is ready for it.

Love

Before a person manages to truly fall in love, he experiences a period of falling in love. This is an attraction that occurs at the hormonal level. Falling in love is accompanied by bright, passionate relationships, strong sexual desire, increased emotionality and mood swings.

Is there everlasting love?

Love can't last forever. It has been proven that the feelings that lovers show are caused by an increase in the blood hormones dopamine and norepinephrine (norepinephrine). It is believed that love originates in the heart, but this is not so. The primary source emitting these hormones is the brain, or rather its most ancient parts, which have been preserved from our primitive ancestors.

Simultaneously with the increase in dopamine and adrenaline in the blood, the amount of serotonin (the pleasure hormone) decreases. A lack of serotonin leads to decreased mood, which leads to associations that love causes suffering. Excess adrenaline leads to increased inspiration and feelings of flight and ascent. Dopamine is a goal hormone. He forces us to achieve the desired object.

However, the time of love does not last forever. A fact established by scientists says that the state of love lasts from 12 to 17 months. This period is quite enough to achieve reciprocity or receive a refusal. If love were eternal, it would burn in its flame happy couples and people would suffer from exhaustion, and rejected lovers would die from suffering.

IN in rare cases falling in love can last up to three years. This most often occurs in people suffering from unrequited love. For happy lovers, nature has provided a mechanism that extinguishes the hot flame of passion, turning it into an even, moderate fire.

Period of stability

When a couple finally gets together, love begins new stage. Lovemaking produces oxytocin and vasopressin in the body - hormones of affection and tenderness. These substances in the body directly affect the production of offspring and the formation of the amazing relationship that binds mother and child.

It is oxytocin and vasopressin that are the antidote to love. They suppress passion hormones and at the same time increase feelings of affection.

The attachment phase lasts exactly as long as it takes to bear and feed the child. This period is four years. After this, many relationships fall apart.

Couples who are married long years, have no hormonal connection. Their feelings are not based on subconscious behavior laid down by our ancient ancestors, but on human relationships. These are completely different feelings. What to call them is up to you. Either friendship or eternal love.

In this article, I will tell you what love really is (without pink snot and fairy tales).

LOVE rules- unconscious component. Animal instinct.

Nature in the process of reproduction, love = does not allow reason to rule. INSTINCTS work!!!

That's why love cannot be explained in words. Explain from the point of view of REASON (reasonable component). If you ask the vast majority of people or just read the Internet about what love is, they will answer you / there you will see everywhere, something soapy, abstract, incomprehensible, extensive, in style, this is something beautiful, this is heartfelt affection, this strong sympathy that simply cannot be described in words, it is something incredible, love is from above, etc. and so on. in that spirit...

In fact, it is impossible to explain from the point of view of REASON (what love is) because love is an unconscious animal instinct. These are emotions. But logic (reason) cannot explain this.

Yes, if you don’t understand (who doesn’t know), we have HOMOS SAPIENS conscious behavior(reasonable, mind), and unconscious(animal component, instincts). And these are two completely different things...

I'm telling you this as it is. Without inventing any bullshit, like they invent almost everything about love...

CONCLUSION: love is an instinctive (not rational) CHOICE OF A PARTNER! All. Dot.

This explains many other things, for example, girls: he’s such an asshole, bad, ur*d, I hate him = why I even love him = I don’t know, but I love him and that’s it. He beats her, beats her - she loves him and that’s it. Guys: I love this chicken and that’s it, why? I don't know, but I can't help it. And so on. Nobody knows “why, what and how”, because it is all CONSCIOUSLY (with reason) to explain - it is impossible, simply impossible, because it is all an unconscious choice (instinctive behavior, animal instincts). Understand?

WHY IS LOVE AN INSTINCT?

Because if HOMO SAPIENS (man) is given the opportunity to choose a partner with his REASON (the rational component), then he will harm EVOLUTION (this is not beneficial)!

Mother Nature took care of this)) and did not give a person such an opportunity, because - this is already logical)) - it is not profitable. There would be no evolution (development), there would not even be me and you (homo sapiens) if a person made the choice of a partner from the point of view of reason, and not instinct.

The fact that you and I already exist means that instinct works EFFECTIVELY! Otherwise (if there were no efficiency) we would not exist. So, in order for Homo Sapiens to evolve as a species, there must be a constant SELECTION OF THE BEST MALES/FEMALES.

Who are these best (how is it manifested)? These are the males and females that are adapted to environment(and their success in interacting with the environment is visible).

For example, if a man is courageous, strong, rich, wealthy, has money, handsome, smart, etc. and so on. = here it is adapted to the environment. All women rate such a man as BETTER than all others who are not like that. Understand? This is natural selection. In natural selection, the fittest males/females win.

If the choice of a partner occurs among the WORST, then there will be no evolution, there will be degradation. The question is, is this beneficial to evolution? No. Mother nature didn’t give you such an opportunity.

In other words, if a person chooses a partner with MIND (the rational component) = he will choose not those who are better suited for development (evolution), but those who are better suited for himself. Come on. Example. On two young ladies. One is a queen (the best), the second is a b*mzhiha (the worst).

Who would you choose - and why? It’s still obvious - you wouldn’t take the damn thing, but why? She’s still a woman, she has a pussy between her legs, from a physiological point of view - everything is okay. No, you don’t want to?)) The same goes for women, don’t you want a b*m? He is also a man and can do the same 😀

Queen…

Instincts will, of course, gravitate towards the queen, because the queen is more beneficial for evolution. And it is more profitable because it is more adapted to the environment (the world) than a b*mzhikha.

How is its adaptability to the environment demonstrated? Well, for example, she is not easily accessible, on the contrary, she is very difficult to access, she is clean, healthy, very beautiful, feminine, smart, etc. and so on. this is women's adaptation to the environment (the world). With what more people adapted to the environment = the more everyone wants him (the more they fall in love with him). Because the selection takes place among the BEST. Understand? This is natural selection in its purest manifestation.

This is how INSTINCT works! He is dedicated to choosing the BEST PARTNERS! Otherwise there would be no evolution (of you and me). Understand? Your mind is not involved in this. Animal instincts rule over love (the mind cannot understand this). Nature made sure that the choice did not take place from the point of view of MIND (otherwise, we are homo sapiens - we will not develop and evolve, but degrade - and this is not beneficial for evolution). Therefore, animal instincts rule! Dot.

Therefore, the selection of sexual partners occurs at the level of animal instincts, and animal instinct considers a partner from the point of view of her (his) adaptability to the surrounding reality. Simply put, in natural selection, the fittest males/females win. That's all.

B*mzhikha...

If the selection took place from the point of view of reason, then it would be something like this: a b*mzhikha is more profitable for me than that tsa-tsa (queen), whom I need to look after, achieve, invest resources in her (money, time, effort, energy, etc.) .) etc. and in the end, it is not known whether he will give or not (will or will not), but what the heck? Now I’ll quickly wash her, feed her, dress her, decorate her, take her around the salons, well, in general, everything on the woman’s side - I’ll mold a “princess” and I’ll have a normal Lala - and I’ll fuck her whenever I want. That is, with a b*mzhikha everything is much faster, simpler and more profitable (from the point of view of reason) than with a queen...

I know this all sounds absurd. This is true. Because INSTINCT rules. Instinct will not allow REASON to rule; instincts evaluate the b*mzhik as unfit (worse, weak).

But, this is just an example for you - so that you understand the whole essence of selecting a partner. You understand the point, right?

Reason = it gives way to instinctive behavior. You won’t even pay attention to the whore, you won’t even think about having a relationship with her, because nature has made sure that this doesn’t happen...

The choice always occurs from the point of view of instinctive (unconscious) behavior (animal instincts, emotions). This is why, in natural selection, the males/females most adapted to the surrounding reality (world) win. That's why all people (men and women) want the best female/male for themselves, because that's how INSTINCT works (this is unconscious behavior). LOVE is an INSTINCT! AND THIS IS BENEFITABLE - EVOLUTION! That's all. Good luck to you!

Congratulations, administrator.

There comes a time in every person's life when doubts arise regarding love. Some people claim all their lives that this is all fiction and that there really is no love, but for others it’s a mystery and a desire to understand themselves.

Actually there is Love, but there is love, and you must be well versed in the differences between these two concepts, so as not to make mistakes and ruin your life. Many people say that if you have experienced both of these feelings, then you happy man, let's look at this in detail.

What is falling in love?

You met a man opposite sex and lost their heads. Your skin crawls, your legs give way, and you feel embarrassed to even speak. It seems that something has changed in this world, and that you no longer feel like a full-fledged person when the object of your adoration is not nearby. You constantly want to be with him or her, it seems that everything inside you is turning upside down, and even your attitude towards yourself is changing. You strive to please the person who made you feel this way with all your might.

Are you ready for this? change your habits, join a gym or visit a plastic surgeon. Psychologists say that you can maintain a feeling for a long time, but only if you rarely see each other, know each other little and are far away. Falling in love is like an emotional hurricane that sweeps you away and gives you a feeling of euphoria. It seems to you that life is divided into before and after you met this person. It is important to learn to manage yourself so as not to do anything stupid under the influence of hormones and intense feelings.

What is love?

Of course, it is important to understand that there is also Love, which is significantly different from falling in love. The person we feel for this feeling, makes you want to take care and give your affection. You constantly want to be close, but separation seems like a real test. You can act quite deliberately and logically; feelings do not overshadow your mind. loving person ready to be kind not only to your soulmate, but also to others.

Who knew Love, they relate differently to the feelings of other people, they know how to show respect and compassion. Often love is transferred to the world, a person wants to smile at everyone and give the owl a great mood. Most often, love is the result of hard work on yourself and on your partner, the desire to change yourself for the sake of someone and learn to live in peace and mutual understanding. In order to maintain love, you need to work long and hard.

What is the difference between love and infatuation?

Modern People are regularly interested in terms, definitions and scientific discoveries psychologists, therefore they know a lot of theory, having a lack of practice. Many people know that love and infatuation are two different feelings, but few can say what their differences are. Love differs from infatuation by the stage of the relationship. It is impossible to immediately begin to love a person without first experiencing love. When you meet a person with whom you like, hormones are first triggered, your brain reacts sharply, everything seems new and unusual to you.

Often love reinforced by the realization that a person is a mystery to you, his body has not yet been explored, and his thoughts and actions cannot be predicted. After falling in love, love can come, but often this does not happen. You simply enjoy the person, enjoy sex and communication with him, and then you realize that nothing connects you, and there is no point in being further together. If people are suitable for each other, then after falling in love, love appears, and they understand that they are destined to be together. It is worth understanding that these feelings are very different and should not be confused.

What mistakes do people make when they confuse love with being in love?

If not on time realize that this is not love, but simple falling in love, then you can make mistakes in your actions. For example, getting married or being married to a person when you are simply experiencing an emotional upsurge. Many people giving in acute sense falling in love, they run to apply for marriage, but they don’t even think about how temporary it is. It seems to them that they will have such passionate sex every day, and the person will remain interesting forever an unsolved mystery. But after certain time love goes away, but whether love will replace it or not is the question. Also, during a period of heightened feelings, many people renounce their friends, spend all their time with their other half and are ready to change their environment, stop communicating with their parents, etc.

Throughout his existence, a person asks the question “ Does love exist? Or is it an illusion - a mixture of attraction and love that passes over time?

Do you think Adam loved Eve? If so, wouldn't his first instinct be to defend her before God, and not to place all the blame on her?

Remember ours about? There have been many arguments that loving husband he doesn’t want his wife to waste her nerves in a low-paying job and in general he likes it when she creates home comfort and takes care of the children. Outstanding Russian psychologist, psychotherapist M.E. Litvak said the following about this: “Quite often, women of lower development marry rich patriarchal men. And they, as a rule, set conditions: “Why do you need to work? I make money. And you do the housework, prepare borscht and pies, because I don’t want to eat in public catering.” Do you think he loves her or not? No. Because he doesn’t allow her to develop.”. We do not take into account some abstract self-development, because any development must have a specific goal, aspiration and outcome.

And the great German psychoanalyst Erich Fromm defined love as follows: “This is an active interest in the life and development of the object of love”. Therefore, love cannot be unhappy, non-reciprocal and tragic. And it cannot limit another person and force him to adapt to any criteria. The tragedy of relationships, when we suffer from the fact that our personal life does not work out, lies in a simple thing - we actually simply do not know how to love. What we mean by love is an escape from loneliness and an attempt to plug up the inner emptiness. That's why nothing comes of it. One popular male psychologist said that men cheat because they do not feel the love of a woman. We, of course, know how men like to cover up ordinary lust with beautiful and catchy phrases, but perhaps there are a number of such men. For this reason, they find a mistress and for the same reason they do not leave for her - because they do not feel love from their mistress either. They see that both his wife and his mistress need him only for some specific reasons, but not on his own. They do not see him as a person and do not love this person with unconditional, undemanding love. They do not aim to help him in his development, but only use him for themselves. Not necessarily financially.

Erich Fromm believed that modern society confuses 2 fundamental things. People think that the main problem- find the right person, the object of love. In fact, the problem is the inability to love. We believe that love is something self-evident, coming as soon as that same person appears. Exactly the opposite - when we know how to love, when we are full of love, then we meet our chosen one. If we love only someone specific and oppose the rest of the world with him, then this is not love, this is selfishness together. And selfishness is destructive - including for love.

The paradox of love is that two become one while remaining two separate and independent individuals. Of course, marriage can exist regardless of these criteria. Many unions are quite successful, based simply on certain agreements - including unspoken ones. But that's exactly what we're discussing. does love exist, and not the form of family structure.

I remember my husband once said to me, “I trust you.” At first I didn’t understand and was even a little offended - I never gave any reason to doubt, so why talk about it again. But it turned out that he meant something completely different. He trusted me to be the person I wanted to be and to do what I wanted to do. Well, as it turned out, he doesn’t trust me with this 100%)) But in fact, quite a lot. I don’t feel like my freedom is being limited in any way - and I don’t abuse it. 3 years ago I was even able to go on vacation without him. We got together, but then serious financial problems arose - nevertheless, my husband decided that at least I should rest. And I flew to Spain for a week with friends.

What happens in many other marriages? It is very difficult to trust your partner to be themselves. Moreover, the partner does not always know how to manage the trust placed in him. Hence the strong tension in the relationship. The woman (usually she) puts a lot of pressure on her husband with her anxiety. Don’t go there, don’t do that, don’t say that, don’t move - your unnecessary movements hurt me. It’s like in the fairy tale about Moomintroll, when his mother decided to do something unusual, and dad strictly besieged her - you’ve never done this, why are you scaring us?! But a person cannot stand still - movement only goes forward.

Love. How wonderful this word is. But not many can explain what it is, not many can understand what it means to them. Everyone knows that a woman loves with her ears, and a man with his stomach. So it is, but this is more of a joke option. Although, based on it, both sexes love both ways. After all, on the first date, people go to restaurants or cafes and eat there, based on the preferences of their opponent.

On subsequent dates, couples can meet at home, where someone will cook the food. And this is where love comes from the stomach. After all, who would want to live with a person who can’t even boil pasta? And throughout the relationship, you compliment each other. This is where love manifests itself through the ears. True, this is the kind of love where it’s easy to cross the line and understand that the person is simply flattering you. But, no matter how strange it may be, such a manifestation of feelings appeals to both the male and female sex.

But this is rather one of, rather than the basis of love. Why? Yes, because it is impossible to feed a person all your life, give him compliments and think that you love him. No. Whatever it may be, love requires much more. She exists. Why? There is simply no other explanation for some actions. For example, you choose furniture. Previously, you would have chosen a black book-sofa, but after you started dating a girl or a man, you decided to choose a white double bed. This is just an example. And in this moment you don't understand why you made this choice. Tastes can also change in music. If you used to listen to hard rock, then most likely you will start listening to pop music or regular rock, without bass and high tones. And it seems like you yourself are starting to like it.
IN different sources are given different definitions to the word love:

1. Feeling highest regard person to another person of the opposite sex
2. A feeling that manifests itself in understanding, sympathy, faith and willingness to do anything for the opposite sex

What is true love? This is the peak of ordinary love, the highest feelings that can be experienced for a person, the highest level of knowledge of a person as a part of oneself. Most of families are created when love begins to move from ordinary to real. No matter how paradoxical it may be, true and ordinary love are different. Ordinary love can be found everywhere: for food, animals, people early stage relationship development. True love can only be for a person and only when one person becomes a part of another. Like this? Well, it's different for everyone. For someone, true love manifests itself when he begins to think not only about himself; for some, when not one plate is placed on the table, but two; someone when, in addition to work, the thought slips into their head: “What to give for the next holiday?” And much more. True love has different manifestations and shape. From the banal “Thank you” to expensive gifts and trips or just the usual phrase “I love you.”

Does true love exist? Of course. Although some people don't believe in it. They consider this one of the manifestations of friendship. Although it’s a strange manifestation: kissing, hugging, sometimes more, but consider it friendship.

Love exists from a young age. As soon as the child comes out of the womb, they begin to instill feelings in him, whatever they would not be. Although, the first feeling that is instilled in a child can probably be considered love. He begins to love the world, people, mom for giving birth, dad for feeding. But love itself is not as dangerous as its possible consequences. Because of strong love that parents and children cannot let each other go in time. As a result, it turns out that parents cannot let the child go for a private life, and children cannot find a partner for later life.

Love is the greatest magic in the world. She can both kill and cure, give birth and eradicate. Not many people can handle this. Therefore, those who cannot cope find themselves alone, and those who cope often live together with the source of love.

Is it possible to distinguish love from banal affection? This question is difficult to answer. Many philosophers have tried to answer it, but few have succeeded. Some went deep and soon could not answer the most primitive questions, while others could not comprehend even the simplest questions of love. And, as a result - this question remained unresolved. Scientists believe that love differs from attachment in actions, feelings and ease of parting. So, for example, a person who is simply attached will not experience attraction, passion for his opponent, or a desire to see him as soon as possible. A person in love will try to meet the object of love, see, kiss, hug, will be bored and look for any moment to meet him. But some feelings are common. For example, jealousy is inherent in both. But still, both feelings are dangerous, because they can manifest themselves in the wrong place.

True love at a distance

This part of love is the hardest. To make it clear, long-distance love is when both people are in different cities, countries and cannot see each other every day. This is difficult and quite problematic. For example, if in different countries, then you need to fill in migration card, and this is a certain number of days (90 or more). That is, for the whole year you can see each other for three months.

In such relationships, trust is important, otherwise everything will fall apart. Why? So who would like it if they were jealous of him every day without trust, pestering him with questions about where and with whom. And in the end it can lead to separation and complete collapse of nerves. And no one needs this. But it’s more difficult for those who have real love, who dote on their partner. He will do everything to be with love even for three hours. In this way, couples begin to value their relationship and strengthen their union.

As we see, true love exists. Those who don’t believe, remember the classics: Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, The Two Captains (the line of Katya and Sanya) and many others. Whatever food we take, there will be love. It happens in life, everywhere. But, unfortunately, it does not always coincide with generally accepted frameworks and norms. IN modern world There is almost no such thing as “true love”. It is more replaced by attraction, attachment. Young people are embarrassed to admit this, or are afraid. In any case, the fact remains a fact. Love and be happy. After all, love is the most beautiful thing in the world.