Aggressive behavior of people. Aggression and aggressiveness

Aggression is a stable personality characteristic, in the presence of which a person is inclined to cause harm to objects around him. Aggression also manifests itself through the expression of negative emotions: anger, rage, anger, directed at external objects and objects. Not everyone understands why a person cannot restrain his rage, or why child abuse and family violence occur. The culprit is aggression, which is manifested by a stable characterological personality trait called aggressiveness.

Aggression manifests itself in different ways, it all depends on the degree of irritation of a person, his character traits and the situation. There are several manifestations of this behavior, which we will consider in detail.

All types are based on several motives of human behavior: aggression arises as a result of the desire to achieve one’s goal (and someone or something interferes with this), the need to psychologically unload, the need to assert oneself.

Reasons for this behavior

Aggression in a person does not develop immediately. There are theories that say that this character trait is inherent in all living beings. In some ways this is true. When a person has to defend himself from danger, he begins to behave aggressively.

But what is important here is the difference between a personality trait and aggression, as a defensive, unintentional action. But many scientists agree that from birth a person does not have aggression; he learns a model of such behavior over the course of his life, depending on the social situation around him.

There are several reasons for aggression:

Aggression in psychology is understood as a socio-psychological phenomenon and does not relate to mental pathologies. According to the results of the study, this behavior occurs subjectively in healthy people in the presence of psychological problems. For example, someone wants to take revenge, someone grew up in this and does not know other models of behavior, others are participants in some extremist movements, some are instilled with the cult of aggression as strength and courage.

Patients with mental illness do not always show aggression. There is evidence that only about 10% of people who cause mental or physical harm to others have mental illness. In other cases, such actions are dictated by psychosis, an exaggerated reaction to current events. In most cases, aggressive behavior is a desire to dominate.

Risk factors for aggression

Not every person will show aggression at the slightest traumatic situation. There are some features of the external situation and its internal perception that lead to damaging and destructive behavior.

Rather, a destructive model of behavior is formed in people prone to impulsiveness, who perceive everything very emotionally, as a result of which they develop a feeling of discomfort and dissatisfaction. When absent-minded, there is a possibility of emotional aggressiveness. If a person is thoughtful, he can make plans on how to show instrumental aggression.

Psychologists have proven that when a person’s basic values ​​are threatened, he becomes aggressive. Thus, it can be argued that any acutely unmet need in any person can lead to this destructive pattern of behavior.

Aggression often occurs when moral defense against stress is weak. With an increased level of anxiety, the likelihood of aggression is also high. An excess of negative emotions in early childhood leads to such patterns. Trying to free himself from the authoritarianism of significant people (parents, leaders of small groups of which the individual is a member), the child has only one choice - to behave aggressively. Success after such behavior consolidates in his mind as a positive moment, the skill of self-affirmation through aggression is formed.

The reasons for the desire to cause moral or physical harm to another, or to oneself, may be irritation of the nerve centers located in the area of ​​the diencephalon.

How to see the manifestation of aggressive behavior?

Some scientists divide aggression into benign and malignant. Benign is a manifestation of courage, perseverance, and ambition. In general, in order to achieve good results in work and career, manifestations of such aggression are even encouraged. But unconstructive, malignant aggressiveness represents a conscious intent to cause harm. This can be seen through the manifestation of such traits as rudeness, cruelty, and violence. Passions, negative emotions and feelings rage within a person.

The manifestations of aggression in men and women are slightly different. Men are characterized by a bright emotional outburst with a physical impact on an object, not necessarily the same one that caused the reaction. This is hitting the table, hitting the wall, waving your arms, stomping. In women, aggression manifests itself through discontent and periodic complaints about life. In this state, women are characterized by constant “nagling” of their husband, gossip, and any unfounded conclusions that carry negative consequences.

Often a person does not realize that he is showing aggression. In this case, we are talking about indirect aggression; he is prone to being picky towards an individual or family. After nagging and realizing that some needs are not met, he moves on to manifestations of verbal aggression: raising his voice, shouting, humiliation and insults, causing psychological harm to the interlocutor.

Ignoring is also considered a manifestation of aggression. Boycott has long been considered one of the effective tortures of a person, since he could not enter into dialogue and felt lonely, flawed and unwanted. Ignoring causes self-flagellation, guilt, that is, auto-aggression. A person punishes himself in this way.

Manifestation of childhood aggressiveness

The manifestation of aggressiveness is much more noticeable in children. They do not know how to hide their emotions. Of course, it is good that negative emotions do not accumulate, but in such a state it is difficult for little aggressors to control themselves. Aggression in such children manifests itself through biting, pushing, hitting, threats, and negative actions. We can say that in children there are two main types of manifestation of the desire to cause harm to someone: physical and verbal aggression.

In adolescents, aggressive behavior is expressed somewhat differently and the mechanisms of its occurrence change slightly. Adolescents are more prone to verbal aggression; when aggressive, physical actions are more cruel, cause more damage, and border on criminality.

The psychological reasons for the manifestation of this condition are the transition from childhood to adulthood, dissatisfaction with the need for acceptance and love, and the unknown of independent life. Physiological changes also occur, which at the hormonal level can cause aggression.

Treatment, correction of aggressive behavior

As you know, non-physiological reasons for the appearance of aggression lie in the environment, family situation, and upbringing. In the case of preclinical aggression, that is, arising for psychological reasons, methods of psychological correction of the behavior of children, parents and adults are used.

In cases of damage to brain structures, hypertrophied psychological aggression, and complex cases of emotional and volitional disorders, drug treatment is necessary.

Psychotherapy to overcome aggression

Aggression develops in a child at a young age, and this behavior, if uncorrected, accompanies a person into adulthood. It is important for parents to know in what cases their child will repress negative emotions, which will become the beginning of aggressive behavior:

Depending on the listed factors, psychotherapeutic methods for correcting aggression are used. A cognitive-behavioral, rational approach to problem solving is often used. The doctor helps a person, a child, learn constructive dialogue with interlocutors, socially adapted behavior, and discharging negative emotions in socially acceptable ways.

Aggression in its brightest manifestations is dangerous for society; the task of a psychotherapist is to teach a person to cope with emotions and work through internal problems - the reasons for such behavior. Psychoanalysis or its variations are also used for this. Methods for analyzing psychological trauma in childhood, removing blocks from the subconscious and developing psychological defense mechanisms help a person solve a problem that has been nurturing for years. Aggression does not disappear immediately after such an analysis. There should be someone nearby who will pay attention to unacceptable emotional reactions. He and the patient’s entourage must show their attention and love for the patient.

Drug treatment

Aggression provoked by physiological reasons can be treated with medications. Pharmacotherapy depends on the underlying clinical disease; especially long-term medications should only be prescribed by a doctor.

Benzodiazepines and antipsychotics are effective in treating manifestations of this behavior; second-generation antipsychotic drugs are also used. Some drugs are used sublingually, while others work more effectively through intramuscular or intravenous injections.

Every day we learn from the news about new facts of violence anywhere in the world. Statistics show how often murders or abuse occur, and in everyday life we ​​often witness angry accusations or shouting.

Behavior that causes harm to another person in the philosophical and moral aspect has always been perceived as evil. And yet, history knows many examples of aggressive behavior not only of individuals, but also of entire nations.

Why do people deliberately seek to cause suffering to others? Why do conflicts occur, accompanied by outbursts of anger and angry screams? Why does a suicide take his own life in defiance of the instinct of self-preservation? There are no clear answers to these questions, therefore the problem of aggression is considered from various points of view - religion, physiology, philosophy and other sciences.

Let's try to figure it out...

Existing theories explain the meaning, causes and mechanisms of aggressive behavior in different ways. Some view aggression as an innate urge, drive, instinct, others argue that the desire to cause harm is caused by frustration (the need for release), others perceive aggression as a certain type of social learning (for example, as a result of imitation or past experience).

So, aggression is the intentional destructive (destructive) behavior of a person, which brings physical harm and (or) psychological discomfort to other people.

Aggression is often associated with negative emotions such as anger, anger, rage, but an aggressive act can occur both in a state of strong emotional arousal and in a state of composure. This behavior is sometimes associated with certain motives and negative attitudes, for example, the desire to offend or harm, racial prejudice, but it can also be unmotivated. Many authors emphasize the direction of aggression towards the subject. In other words, fighting dishes in anger, hitting the wall with a fist, in their opinion, is not aggressive behavior, but rather refers to expressive behavior. Nevertheless, such outbursts of negative emotions over time can also be directed towards living beings.

Types of aggressive behavior.

Manifestations of aggressive behavior are very diverse. The following types of aggression can be distinguished:

1. Physical (aimed at causing bodily harm) and verbal (using words).

4. Active and passive (“putting a spoke in the wheel”)

5. Auto-aggression (directed at oneself)

6. Instrumental (as a way to achieve a goal).

Aggressive actions act as either a means to achieve a certain goal, or as psychological release, or as satisfaction of the need for self-affirmation.

Causes of aggression.

Most often, aggressive behavior develops under the influence of the following unfavorable factors:

1. Substance abuse, which leads to the absence or weakening of control over the situation, the desire to satisfy only one’s needs.

2. Childhood mental trauma and educational defects. The actions of parents can be the cause of children's aggressiveness. Aggression is promoted by passion for computer games, films, and television shows with scenes of violence.

3. Problems in personal life, instability, social and everyday difficulties.

4. Accumulation of nervous tension, lack of proper rest.

Is it possible to cope with aggression?

Aggression always brings suffering, sometimes even to those who act as the aggressor. But it is possible to cope with it. Aggressive behavior, like any other pattern of human activity, can be changed. Psychotherapy will help you understand the reasons for your own aggressiveness, learn new adaptive ways of reacting in difficult situations, and be able to cope with your own emotional state; in particular, it has been proven to be highly effective.

Aggression and aggressiveness have always been a part of our world, people have constantly encountered and continue to encounter these phenomena in their daily lives. Aggression is a certain type of action aimed at causing moral or physical harm to other people, it is an attack on them with the aim of causing harm. And aggressiveness is not just a character trait of a person, in which he reacts aggressively to everything, but it is also a natural manifestation of his bestial essence.

Aggressive behavior is primarily characteristic of less intellectually developed people, and at the same time, quite active people, whose endless desires are supported by great opportunities. Being weak and feeling his weakness, a person will not attack other people, because fear will not allow him to do this. But feeling his strength and seeing the opportunities that it gives, a person acts more boldly, more assertively, more aggressively. Consequently, weak people are less aggressive than strong people, but nevertheless, the aggression of weak people can be expressed in a hidden form, which is sometimes no less, if not more dangerous, than an open form of aggression.

No matter how strong or weak we are, we are still very aggressive creatures by nature and our aggression is associated primarily with the need to defend our interests in this cruel world, in a world of limited resources and boundless selfishness. Therefore, we should perceive our animal essence positively, since nature endowed us with it not by chance, we simply need it for survival. We have created a world in which even the weakest human individuals can survive, whereas in nature only the strongest survive, only those who can fight not only for their lives, but also for their place in the sun. Our world, the world of people, is an unreal world, an artificial world in which aggression and aggressiveness are perceived negatively, while in the wild, this phenomenon is natural and necessary. Aggressive behavior does not require ethical assessment and interpretation on our part; it simply exists, and has always existed in our lives, as a natural and, as mentioned above, necessary, innate form of behavior. And as we are constantly convinced of this, even in our seemingly civilized world, animal laws often operate, under which it is important for a person to be able to, as they say, awaken the beast within himself.

The fact that aggression has an emotional connotation is explained primarily by the fact that for a targeted attack, for an attack, for a powerful and lightning strike aimed at destroying one’s enemy or one’s victim, a person needs a lot of energy. And he draws energy from his emotions, which, although they turn off his thinking, at the level of instincts allow him to act very effectively. But at the same time, the maximum effectiveness of the aggressor’s actions is more related to the rationality of his behavior than to the strength of his emotions. Remember the words of Muhammad Ali - float like a butterfly and sting like a bee? Anger, anger, aggression, and nonsense in general need to be controlled by the mind, then a person’s aggressive behavior will be more effective. In fact, one person causing harm or any damage to another person, without special need, is an unnatural manifestation of aggression. People, in addition to their hostility, also have a tendency to cooperate, similar to other animals, which, if necessary, gather in packs or herds. And with such behavior, when it is important for a person to establish cooperation with other people, it is more useful for him not so much to be aggressive as to be able to find a common language with all people, or at least with most of them, for which he needs to develop his thinking. Do you think we are so nice to each other only because of our ethical upbringing? Nothing like that, in most cases, we are forced to be polite to other people, and are forced to take into account their opinions and their interests. But when we have the opportunity not to do this, when everything depends only on our decision - to be or not to be a person who respects other people, we often make a decision not in favor of these very other people. A person with great potential, often without any twinge of conscience, harms other people for the sake of his interests and his boundless selfishness. Therefore, we all need to be moderately aggressive so that our aggression is a deterrent to the exorbitant ambitions of other people. Being aggressive when it is really required is very useful, since in every society, without exception, a person needs to be able to protect his interests and be able to position himself correctly in order to occupy the most advantageous position in comparison with other people, preferably the position of a leader.

But the most important thing that you and I should understand is that the aggression of smart people differs in form from the aggression of stupid people, or better said, wild and underdeveloped people. However, the content of aggressive actions remains unchanged, regardless of any personality differences between people. I would even say that in some, not all, cases, aggressive actions of smart and very smart people can be much more dangerous than similar actions on the part of fools. Disguised, as a rule, under good intentions, the aggression of some very literate people does not meet resistance precisely because it is not obvious. And, unfortunately, for most people, the truism that the road to hell is paved with good intentions remains empty words, heard and repeated many times, but never understood. We all need something from this world and from other people, and many of us are ready to go to great lengths in order to take more of someone else's and give less of our own. And often people get their way precisely through aggressive behavior, through violence, which can only be resisted with the help of retaliatory violence.

When we observe aggressiveness in children, we must understand that the point is not in the child’s abnormality, the point is in his natural desire for leadership, in his desire to shape his environment at his own discretion. You can find a lot of information on childhood aggression, and in most cases it will tell you that an aggressive child is not normal, or at least not completely normal. But in reality this is not so, or rather, not entirely so. The fact is that in children, due to their insufficient development, aggression is expressed in a very primitive form; it cannot be hidden, as in some cunning adults, when we do not see obvious signs of aggression against us or against someone else , but at the same time we suffer from it. Well, let’s say, in our society there is such a thing as legitimate violence, that is, legal, fair violence, which most people accept as a forced necessity, which cannot be avoided. The most striking example of such violence is the death penalty, which is supposedly a fair punishment for especially dangerous criminals. But, in most cases, legitimate violence is not at all legitimate and even completely unjust. It is simply cultivated and ennobled by the good intentions of the aggressor, who takes advantage of the opportunities available to him and causes harm to another person. We must understand that even the most dangerous criminals did not appear out of nowhere. They were not born who they later became, they became who their parents, society and their environment in general made them.

But when we commit violence against criminals, we consider it completely justified and do not notice that there are no fewer crimes in our lives, although, of course, the severity of the laws somewhat pacifies some hotheads. However, from the point of view of effectiveness, fighting the consequence, and not the cause, of violence is absolutely pointless, and the fact that we do this speaks of our aggressiveness, which is expressed in a somewhat unhealthy form. We don't solve the crime problem in our society when we punish criminals, we just more or less control it. But, firstly, it is possible to solve this problem, and secondly, it is more useful for each of us. Why doesn't anyone solve it properly? But because every problem needs someone who is able to solve it, which means that society will always depend on someone’s power over itself, which solves unsolvable problems. So I think there is no need for me to explain to you how such dependence of society on an iron hand can be beneficial for some, far from the stupidest people. In general, we don’t have any legitimate violence now, there is simply violence that we put up with, or that we are forced to put up with. It follows from this that even in the most civilized and cultured society, some people who have the necessary opportunities for this systematically commit violent acts against other, weaker people. And we have not yet come up with anything more effective against aggression, except adequate retaliatory aggression that can protect us. Well, if it were otherwise, we would only do what we would do, turning the other cheek to attack, instead of creating weapons, forming an army, having a police force, arming ourselves, and so on.

So it turns out that from early childhood, a person is not only inclined, but he is even drawn to commit violence against other people. It turns out because, firstly, our ambitions are initially prohibitively high, and secondly, within ourselves, we instinctively understand that it’s either us or us. But aggression simply moves us in this direction, towards domination over other people, it points us to goals without offering the means to achieve them, because this is already the task of our brain. And only the fear of punishment serves as a prevention of aggression, and then only in those cases when we are talking about people who are able to feel this fear. No amount of fear will stop a fool, therefore the severity of the laws does not play a role for him, and no one in our society deals or plans to deal with the exception of the possibility of a fool appearing in general, as we found out above. So it is precisely need that forces a person to behave more or less kindly towards other people, and to look for ways to cooperate with them. Whether we like it or not, violence in our society is the norm, not the exception, and despite our negative attitude towards it, it is committed regularly. Each of us, at least once in our lives, has become a victim of violence in one form or another. Even the same deception that is encountered at every step today is also violence, it is the violence of a mentally developed person over a less developed person. We, quite naturally, consider it a crime when an adult deceives a child and, say, induces him to have sexual intercourse? This is aggression, isn't it? Well, why don’t we treat the same situations with adults in a similar way, who, despite their years, can sometimes be much stupider than children? Do we consider it acceptable for our lives to take advantage of other people's stupidity, or have we been taught that this is normal?

Deception, as a manifestation of more sophisticated and cultivated aggression, usually replaces more primitive, physical aggression, which we perceive more emotionally, and therefore we are able to more or less correctly interpret all the fairly primitive actions of other people. But it is precisely this skill, the ability to culturally show their aggressiveness, that children lack, who are forced to behave more openly, more primitively and more predictably, thus achieving essentially the same goals as adults, that is, achieving recognition, leadership position in one’s environment and success, in the end. Why do we have an extremely negative attitude towards a murderer who killed only a few people, but at the same time we are completely normal about the tobacco or alcohol business and those who stand behind it, despite the fact that these businessmen kill millions of people? Are we so smart that we are not able to appreciate and understand the scale of such evils? Or are we so cowardly that we are forced to accept one kind of violence and oppose another? Each person has his own answer to this question, depending on his level of development and his honesty, first of all with himself.

Psychology, my friends, is what we need for you and me, to explain to us the patterns of our behavior, and not to interpret it. Otherwise, we would not call it science. If there is violence in your life and you are its victim, then you can seek help from a priest or an inadequate psychologist who will help you accept this violence, come to terms with it, forgive the aggressor and, in some cases, allow him to continue to commit violence against you and further. You need it? How long are you going to turn the other cheek and allow other people to abuse you? Maybe you should seek help from adequate people, adequate psychologists who will help you protect yourself? Your instincts will tell you the answers to these questions - trust them. Try to seek help from those who are truly able to help you, regardless of your personal beliefs and attitude towards this or that person. You must be able to fight violence; aggressive behavior must always, remember, always meet with resistance, otherwise it will be impossible to cope with it. But in order to fight back, you need to be able to do it, and no matter what peace-loving people propagandize, every blow can and should be responded to with exactly the same blow, or better yet, with a stronger blow. An aggressive person, even if he gives up his excessive ambitions, will do so only if he meets resistance in the form of no less, or even greater, aggressiveness from other people whose interests he has decided to encroach on. In such cases they say that a scythe found a stone. Or - there is no method against scrap, except for another similar scrap.

Do not think that our not the most beautiful behavior, or even absolutely antisocial behavior, is the result of our primitiveness. Aggression and belligerence are often a completely conscious decision and a carefully thought-out policy aimed at a person achieving his goals at the expense of other people. Every person who strives to realize his desires always has the opportunity to show aggression towards someone weaker, and I assure you, many take advantage of this opportunity. Some people create opportunities for themselves in which they can take advantage of someone else's weakness to achieve their goals. To do this, they make other people stupid through a certain psychological and ideological influence on them. V.I. Lenin said: “As long as the people are stupid and uneducated, the most important art for us is cinema and the circus.” But, I thought so, and came to the conclusion that this circus and cinema are needed to make people stupid. If you are very smart people, you will be able to resist any aggression, which means that you will not be easily subjugated to your will. But if you are illiterate, stupid, disorganized, not united, and even intimidated people, then they can do anything with you. Moreover, your ill-conceived and in some cases completely inappropriate goodwill and openness will make you easy prey for a more aggressive and insidious person who will certainly take advantage of all your weaknesses in his own interests. And you will not oppose anything to someone else’s aggression, no matter in what form it will be expressed, if you yourself are white and fluffy.

I’m not saying that your response to any aggression directed at you must necessarily be mirrored, and it cannot always be so, since we all have different capabilities. But it must be your answer. Not by force, not by cunning, not by cunning, not by intelligence, not by intelligence, but by pity and sycophancy, but we must be able to repel our enemies. Otherwise we will simply be destroyed. Each person, I repeat, each person, has his own strengths. If you are not, in principle, an aggressive person and cannot be one, then look for other opportunities to protect yourself and defend your interests. I consider aggression to be any human activity aimed at opposing or suppressing other people, no matter how. If someone tries to deceive me, for me this is an aggressive person; if someone proves to me that they are subjectively right, in order to push their interests through me, for me this is also an act of aggression. So, psychosis and physical violence, savagery and cruelty are not necessarily manifestations of aggressive behavior; any unequal relationship between people, in which one person uses another person for his own purposes, is aggression.

Why is that? Yes, because in this world, there can be as many conventions as you like, while according to the laws of nature, which we cannot circumvent, any use of one’s capabilities by one creature against another creature can be considered aggression. Here you need to understand that it does not matter at all what methods are used to achieve people’s goals related to obtaining benefits at the expense of another person or other people. All the reasons for aggression that we deal with, from the point of view of our nature, are completely justified. Just like our reluctance to submit to someone else’s will and resist it in every possible way is also a natural human reaction to aggression towards oneself. It is not natural to serve other people of your own free will, and not to understand that it is not natural for you. This is a truly unhealthy person’s perception of reality. Therefore, it is so important to understand exactly when and how someone acts against us, so as not to be surprised by the unplanned results that each of us receives in our lives. Well, will it really matter to you how you are forced to work for someone - at gunpoint or by creating conditions under which you will be forced to do what someone needs you to do? Only, perhaps, it will have some significance for your emotional state, but not for the situation as a whole. If, as a result of a certain influence on you from other people, you are forced to serve someone, then it does not matter at all how you were forced to do this; in any case, aggression was committed against you. It’s just that not very smart people do not react to unstructured management of them, that is, to management carried out through manipulation, as something negative. This means that such people do not consider as aggression those phenomena because of which they are forced to obey other people’s instructions and serve other people’s interests, contrary to their own desire, true desire, and their own interests. And if you don’t see your enemy, then you can’t fight him, because you don’t understand what kind of threat you need to counter, and therefore you can’t find the necessary means to adequately counter this threat or threats. Therefore, it is very important to recognize aggression in any of its manifestations, preferably in the early stages, and only then learn to respond adequately to it.

So don’t keep the beast inside you in a cage, let it have the opportunity to show its qualities in especially difficult situations for you, when you are really in danger. The only thing an aggressive person really needs is control over his aggressive state. We must be able to manage ourselves and our emotions, which can only be done through our mind, which must be developed and forced to work. A primitive person reacts to everything quite emotionally; the more emotions there are in a person’s behavior, the less reasonableness there is in this behavior. But as soon as we accustom ourselves to constantly think before acting, we accustom our brain to analyze the situation and the information coming to us, reason about it, calculate various options for the development of events in our various actions, then our emotions fade into the background, and we can control our behavior. Including, due to the activity of our thinking, we will be able to control our aggression, not by fighting it, but by competently managing its energy.

Pay attention to how many conflict situations arise in our lives. People constantly argue about something, quarrel with each other, and commit violence against each other. To the best of their ability, every person, I repeat, everyone, do not think that you are different, strives to dominate someone, to control someone. And with such aspiration, conflicts are inevitable. Even within our own family, we do not know how to live in peace and harmony. But in fact, there is no difference between family quarrels and big wars, in which many people die, because in both cases, human egoism, the human desire to dominate and defend one’s interests, is met with exactly the same desire from the outside other people or their opposition to this desire. And a conflict arises. Only the scale of different conflicts may be different; during family quarrels, fewer people suffer than during a major war. But if you pay attention to the general statistics of domestic violence, it turns out that all family quarrels and the violence that follows them is a very big war.

And in war, as in war, there is no time for sentimentality and tenderness; in it you need to be tough and aggressive and at times very cruel. To protect our lives, as well as the lives of people dear to us, we definitely need to be able to be aggressive. In everyday life, we can and should be civilized and cultured people in order to maintain a more or less acceptable atmosphere in society for us and our life. But when we are forced to enter into confrontation with other people, when we are forced to defend our interests and defend our values, as well as the life I have already mentioned, then we need to use everything that nature has given us, including aggression and our other animal qualities. Many in this life will try to test your strength in order to find your weak points and use them to subjugate you to their will. And if you cannot or do not want to respond properly to these hostile attempts to bend you, then it can cost you dearly. Many people are only reasonable in appearance, but in reality, truly intelligent people are very rare, while we are forced to meet people who are primitive and very aggressive by nature much more often. And we need to be able to interact with them, no matter how we treat them. Each of us has a certain set of qualities that we can use for both good and bad deeds. And you can pursue any goals in your life, without paying attention to the means of achieving them, but at the same time, your behavior will always be reflected in the adequate attitude of other people towards you.

You would do a lot of things in your own way in this life, if it were your will, you would definitely take advantage of many, many for your own purposes, if only you could. And you definitely wouldn’t take into account some people who are wrong from your point of view, getting the actions you need from them, if they only allowed you to give a damn about them. You are not a good or a bad person, you are just a person with the inherent qualities of this being. You will always want more than what you already have, and your aggression, in one form or another, will always come out. And only the fear of retaliatory violence will stop you from committing some, not the best, actions that will seem necessary to you, or at least desirable for you, at one time or another in your life. See for yourself how much our lives depend on the fear of punishment, without which we are unable to maintain normal human relationships with each other. Without a legitimate form of violence, or rather, without its illusion, it is generally impossible to create any kind of normal society that does not get bogged down in civil strife. We should not consider ourselves too intelligent beings, because intelligent beings do not need a stick to do as they should be done, and not as they want to do. And as long as we think more about the fact that we are very developed beings, but are not such in reality, aggression and aggressiveness will be companions of our lives.

It is important for each of us to keep any of our emotions under control, including aggression. Animals are no less aggressive than us, but as you can see for yourself, it is not they who have conquered us, but we who have subdued them and keep them under control. Therefore, it is important for us not so much to rely on our natural instincts as on our mental development, which has always moved us forward and helped us achieve outstanding results. We should transform aggression into energy that stimulates our activity. Do you dislike something, do you hate someone, do you want to destroy your enemies, are you very angry with other people? Well, this happens in our lives and you can understand. But because of this, there is no need to awaken the beast in yourself and rush at people with wild screams, solving all your problems with the help of brute force; this is too dangerous and too ill-conceived in most cases. Better turn on your brains and look for solutions to your problems with their help. And your aggressiveness will give you energy with which you will force yourself to work on solving all your problems.

Wildness, friends, is only appropriate in a wild environment, and if you don’t want to constantly worry about your back, which might get a knife stuck in it, then don’t cynically take advantage of other people’s weaknesses to your advantage. Remember that every person contributes to the atmosphere of the society in which he lives.

Unmotivated aggression can arise as a result of a strong shock or a critical situation. However, this symptom may appear out of nowhere, which should alert a person. Unmotivated aggression for no particular reason may indicate the presence of a serious illness.

Aggression as a symptom of a disease

The appearance of unmotivated aggression occurs as a result of certain diseases. These include:

  • hyperthyroidism;
  • excess weight;
  • neurological disorders;
  • personality disorders;
  • injuries;
  • malignant neoplasms.

Hyperthyroidism. Increased irritability for no particular reason may indicate problems with hormonal levels. Often this symptom develops in women. Affected people may feel hungry but remain thin. Excessive food consumption does not affect your figure in any way. The disease can be recognized by nervousness, high activity, red skin and excessive sweating.

Excess weight. Fat deposits can provoke the production of estrogen. As a result, there is a negative impact on the psyche, both in women and men. It is enough to get rid of extra pounds - and the unpleasant symptom will go away by itself.

Neurological disorders. Aggression can be a symptom of serious illnesses and lead to... A person gradually loses interest in life and withdraws into himself. In this case, excessive aggressiveness and memory problems are noted. This symptomatology is a serious reason to consult a doctor.

Personality disorders. Unmotivated aggression can be a sign of serious mental problems and even schizophrenia. Most schizophrenics live normal lives, presenting no danger to others. During periods of exacerbation, their aggressiveness increases, which requires psychiatric treatment. Trauma and malignant neoplasms. Mental excitability can be caused by brain damage. Rage and high activity may give way to apathy. All this indicates a serious injury or tumor process.

Often the causes of aggression are hidden in sociopathy, stress disorder or alcohol addiction. The first condition is a character anomaly. A person does not need the company of other people, moreover, he is afraid of them. This is a congenital problem associated with the inferiority of the nervous system. Stress disorder creates a hostile attitude towards others. This happens if a person is constantly in the midst of unpleasant situations. An aggressive state is also typical for people suffering from alcoholism.

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Aggression in men

Unmotivated aggression among representatives of the stronger half can occur due to physiological and psychological characteristics. Increased irritability may indicate chronic diseases, in particular damage to the endocrine system. Nervousness is caused by constant conflicts and stressful situations.

Attacks of aggression can occur due to grumpiness and rudeness. Psychological nervousness can appear as a result of constant lack of sleep, hormonal changes, overwork or depression. The man is dissatisfied with himself and takes his anger out on others. Aggression can also be motivated, namely, associated with noisy neighbors, loud music or TV.

Sometimes even the most non-conflict people lose their temper and take out their anger on others. This is often due to the fact that a person has been accumulating negative emotions for years and simply does not give them a way out. Over time, patience runs out and aggression comes out for no apparent reason. Sometimes one negative sign is enough for a symptom to appear. This could be a loud voice or a sudden movement. The person breaks down instantly and is unable to control himself. It is necessary to monitor your own condition and try to stop aggression in time.

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Aggression in women

The main reason for aggression in women is misunderstanding and powerlessness. This happens when a representative of the fair sex is unable to express herself without the support of others. The absence of a specific plan of action causes an emotional explosion.

Aggression is not dangerous in all cases. Sometimes this is the only way to throw out emotions to activate new strength and energy. However, you should not resort to this all the time. Aggression is a positive phenomenon, but only if it is aimed at solving a specific problem. If this condition is constant and does not bring any relief, family members and relatives fall under the negative influence. In this case, aggression indicates chronic fatigue and can appear as a result of constant noise, an influx of negative emotions and minor troubles. If you do not learn to deal with this condition, there is a risk of developing constant aggression. This entails dissatisfaction with one's own life. As a result, not only the woman herself suffers, but also the people around her.

Motivated aggression can be caused by diseases, lack of communication and constant noise. Often a woman is susceptible to this condition while raising a child. She has a lack of communication and opportunities for self-expression. All these conditions need to be controlled.

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Aggression in children and adolescents

The cause of unmotivated aggression in children can even be the upbringing of parents. Excessive care or, on the contrary, its absence instills certain thoughts and emotions in the child. Dealing with this condition is not so easy, since in adolescence everything is perceived most acutely.

Aggression is based on gender differences in children. Thus, boys reach a special peak of aggressiveness at the age of 14-15 years. For girls, this period begins earlier, at 11 and 13. Aggression can arise as a result of not getting what they want or out of the blue. At this age, children believe that they are right, but their parents do not understand them. The result is aggressiveness, isolation and constant irritability. You shouldn’t put pressure on your child, but waiting until everything goes away on its own is also dangerous.

There are several main reasons why childhood aggression can develop. These include:

  • indifference or hostility on the part of parents;
  • loss of emotional connection with loved ones;
  • lack of respect for the child's needs;
  • excess or lack of attention;
  • denial of free space;
  • lack of opportunities for self-realization.

All this indicates that parents themselves are capable of creating the cause of aggression. The formation of character and personal qualities is carried out in childhood. Lack of proper upbringing is the first path to aggression. In some cases, specialized treatment is required aimed at suppressing negative emotions.

Facts of violence in which harm is caused to specific individuals are called aggression. Every day a person either personally or hears from others about how they have been treated poorly.

If we talk about the moral side of this issue, then aggressive behavior is considered bad, evil, unacceptable. But why does a person allow himself to get angry and hurt himself or others?

What is Aggression?

What is aggression? There are many opinions about what aggression is. Some say that aggression is an instinctive reaction and manifestation of a person. Others argue that aggression is caused by frustration - the desire to discharge. Still others point out that aggression is a social phenomenon when a person learns it from others or is influenced by negative past experiences.

In psychology, aggression is understood as destructive behavior in which a person causes physical harm or creates psychological discomfort to other people. Psychiatry views aggression as a person’s desire to protect himself from an unpleasant and traumatic situation. Aggression is also understood as a way of self-affirmation.

Aggressive behavior is considered to be directed towards a living object. However, the psychological help website claims that smashing dishes or walls can soon develop into violence against living beings. Aggression is often equated with rage, anger or anger. However, an aggressive person does not always experience emotions. There are cold-blooded people who become aggressive under the influence of their prejudices, beliefs or views.

What reasons push a person to such behavior? Anger can be directed both at other people and at oneself. The reasons may be different, as well as the forms of manifestation of aggression. Each case is individual. Psychologists note something else: it is important to be able to cope with one’s own aggression, which manifests itself in every person. If someone needs help, they can get it. This is what a psychological help site does, a site where a person can not only read useful information, but also work through his negative aspects, which often interfere with building favorable relationships with others.

Display of aggression

Aggression manifests itself in different ways. Depending on the goal that is achieved by aggressive actions and the methods of the actions committed, aggression can be benign and malignant:

  1. Benign aggression refers to courage, courage, ambition, perseverance, and bravery.
  2. Malignant aggression refers to violence, rudeness, and cruelty.

Every living creature is aggressive. Every organism contains genes that allow it to show aggression for the sake of survival, to save itself from death. Thus, there is defensive aggression, which occurs at the moment of danger. All living beings have it. When a living organism is in danger, it becomes decisive, runs away, attacks, and defends itself.

In contrast to this aggression, there is a destructive one, which is inherent only to humans. It has no meaning or purpose. It arises only on the basis of the emotions, feelings, thoughts of a person who simply did not like something.

There is another manifestation of aggression – pseudo-aggression. It occurs in situations where a person must make every effort to achieve a goal. For example, during competition, athletes become aggressive to give themselves energy and motivation.

A special manifestation of aggression, which is inherent in all living beings, is the desire to survive. When there is not enough food, there is no intimacy, there is no protection, then the body becomes aggressive. Everything is aimed at survival, which often involves infringement of the boundaries and freedom of other living beings.

Anyone can become aggressive. Often the strong provoke the weak, who then also look for weaker individuals in order to take it out on them. There is no defense against aggression. In everyone it manifests itself as a reaction to an external stimulus. Both the one who caused it and the one who simply came into contact can become a victim of aggression.

The manifestation of aggression is an expression of dissatisfaction and dissatisfaction. It can be either open, when a person knocks on the table or constantly nags, or hidden - periodic nagging.

Types of aggression

As we consider aggression, we can distinguish its types:

  • Physical, when force is used and specific harm is caused to the body.
  • Indirect, when irritation is expressed towards another person.
  • Resistance to established laws and morals.
  • Verbal, when a person verbally shows aggression: screams, threatens, blackmails, etc.
  • Envy, hatred, resentment for unfulfilled dreams.
  • Suspicion, which manifests itself in distrust of persons when it seems that they are planning something bad.
  • Feelings of guilt that arise from the thought that a person is bad.
  • Direct – spreading gossip.
  • Directed (there is a goal) and disordered (random passers-by become victims).
  • Active or passive (“putting spokes in the wheels”).
  • Auto-aggression is hatred towards oneself.
  • Heteroaggression – anger is directed towards others: violence, threats, murder, etc.
  • Instrumental, when aggression is used as a method of achieving a goal.
  • Reactive, when it manifests itself as a reaction to some external stimulus.
  • Spontaneous, when it manifests itself without good reason. Often occurs as a consequence of internal phenomena, for example, mental illness.
  • Motivational (targeted), which is done consciously for the purpose of intentionally causing damage and pain.
  • Expressive when it manifests itself in facial expressions, gestures, and a person’s voice. His words and actions do not express aggression, but his body position and tone of voice indicate otherwise.

It's human nature to get angry. And the most important question that worries everyone who has become a victim of someone else’s aggression is why they yelled at him, beat him up, etc.? Everyone is concerned about the reasons for aggressive behavior, especially if the aggressor has not explained anything. And how different aggression can be has already been discussed.

Causes of aggression

There are many reasons for aggressive behavior. Aggression can be different and happens in different situations, so you often need to look at the complex of everything that happens in order to understand the motives of a person’s actions.

  1. Substance abuse (alcohol, drugs, etc.). Under the influence of drugs, a person cannot adequately respond to a specific situation.
  2. Personal problems that are associated with dissatisfaction in personal relationships, intimacy, loneliness, etc. Any mention of this problem causes a negative reaction.
  3. Mental traumas of childhood. Developed neurosis against the background of dysfunctional relationships with parents.
  4. Authoritarian and strict education that develops internal aggression.
  5. Watching films and programs where the topic of violence is actively discussed.
  6. Inadequate rest, overwork.

Aggression may be a symptom of a serious illness that is often associated with damage to the brain:

  • Schizophrenia.
  • Encephalitis.
  • Neurasthenia.
  • Meningitis.
  • Epileptoid psychopathy, etc.

Public influence should not be excluded. Religious movements, propaganda, racial hatred, morality, images of politicians or strong personalities who are aggressive develop a similar quality in observers.

Often people who cause harm refer to a bad mood or even a mental disorder. In fact, only 12% of all aggressive people are mentally ill. Other individuals show their negative emotions as a result of an incorrect reaction to what is happening, as well as a lack of self-control.

Aggression is noted as a person’s dissatisfaction with life in general or a specific case in particular. Accordingly, the main reason is dissatisfaction, which a person does not eliminate through favorable actions.

Verbal aggression

Almost everyone has encountered this form of aggression. Verbal aggression is the most common and obvious. Firstly, the tone of the speaker’s voice changes: he starts shouting, raises his voice, and makes it ruder. Secondly, the context of what is being said changes.

Psychologists have noted many forms of verbal aggression. In everyday life, a person encounters the following manifestations:

  1. Insults, threats, blackmail.
  2. Slander, spreading gossip.
  3. Silence in response to a person’s questions, refusal to communicate, ignoring cues.
  4. Refusing to defend another person who is being criticized.

The question still remains whether silence is a way of aggression. There is no clear answer here. It all depends on the reasons for the silence of the person who performs this action. If silence occurs with accompanying aggressive emotions, anger, and reluctance to speak because it can be rude, then we are talking about verbal aggression of a passive nature. However, if a person is silent because he did not hear or is not interested in the topic of the conversation, therefore he wants to transfer it to another topic, remains calm and in a friendly mood, then there is no question of any aggression.

Due to the social system and morality, which punishes anyone who shows physical aggression, people are forced to use the only way to express it - words. Open aggression is expressed in specific threats, insults and humiliation of the personality of another. Hidden aggression manifests itself through persecution and pressure on a person, for example, by spreading gossip. Although these types of verbal aggression are unacceptable, a person is not deprived of freedom for them. That's why people continue to use this form as a way of communicating with those with whom they are dissatisfied.

Speech aggression

Let us dwell directly on the verbal form of manifestation of aggression, which is the most common in society. Speech aggression manifests itself in curses, negative assessments (criticism), offensive words, obscene speech, mocking intonation, crude irony, indecent allusions, and a raised voice.

What the aggressor does causes irritation and indignation. Aggression of both the first and second interlocutor arises on the basis of negative emotions that arise immediately or after some time. Some people immediately say what outrages them, others only after a while begin to show their aggression in various ways towards those who humiliated or insulted them.

Often, verbal aggression is a consequence of a person’s hostility towards a certain group of people. For example, low social status can provoke an individual’s hostile attitude towards those with whom he communicates. Such a confrontation is possible both in an ascending hierarchy and in a descending one. For example, hidden aggression is often manifested by subordinates towards the boss and by the boss towards subordinates. Subordinates often feel jealous of the leadership's high position, as well as its commanding tone. A boss may hate his subordinates because he considers them stupid, weak, inferior creatures.

Rarely, the causes of speech aggression are upbringing, mental characteristics, or a breakdown.

Undoubtedly, society is considering the issue of not only extinguishing negative emotions when they arise, but also preventing conflicts with people who show anger. It should be understood that sometimes aggression is acceptable because it helps achieve certain goals, such as suppressing the enemy. However, this method should not be used as a universal one.

Approaches to aggression

Scientists from various fields of science are considering approaches to aggression. For each representative it means something different. The normative approach perceives aggression as destructive behavior that does not correspond to the moral and ethical standards of society. The criminal approach also considers aggression as an act of unlawful behavior that is aimed at causing physical and moral harm to a living object.

  • The depth psychological approach perceives aggressive behavior as instinctive, inherent in all living beings.
  • The goal-directed approach perceives aggression as a goal-directed action. From the point of view of achieving goals, evolution, adaptation, appropriation of important resources, dominance.
  • Schwab and Koeroglow view aggressive behavior as a person’s desire to establish the integrity of his life. When it is violated, a person becomes aggressive.
  • Kaufma views aggression as a way of acquiring resources necessary for life, which is dictated by the natural need for survival.
  • Erich Fromm viewed aggressive behavior as a desire to dominate and dominate living beings.
  • Wilson characterized the aggressive nature of a person as the desire to eliminate the actions of another subject who, by his actions, infringes on his freedom or genetic survival.
  • Matsumoto noted aggression as an act that causes pain and physical or mental harm to another individual.
  • Shcherbina characterized verbal aggression as a verbal manifestation of feelings, intentions and desires towards another person.
  • Cognitive theory considers aggression as a way of learning to contact a person with external factors.
  • Other theories combine the above concepts to understand the nature of aggressive behavior.

Forms of aggression

Erich Fromm identified the following forms of aggression:

  • Reactive. When a person realizes that his freedom, life, dignity or property is in danger, he becomes aggressive. Here he can defend himself, take revenge, be jealous, envy, be disappointed, etc.
  • Archaic bloodlust.
  • Gaming. Sometimes a person just wants to show his dexterity and skills. It is at this moment that he can resort to malicious jokes, mockery, and sarcasm. There is no hatred or anger here. A person is simply playing at something that may irritate his interlocutor.
  • Compensatory (malignant). It is a manifestation of destructiveness, violence, cruelty, which helps a person make his life complete, not boring, and fulfilling.

A person who becomes aggressive has the following characteristics:

  1. Sensitivity, vulnerability, acute experience of discomfort.
  2. Impulsiveness.
  3. Absent-mindedness, which leads to emotional aggressiveness, and thoughtfulness, which provokes instrumental aggressiveness.
  4. Hostile interpretation of what is happening.

A person is not able to completely get rid of his aggression, because sometimes it is useful and necessary. It is here that he allows himself to show his nature. Only a person who knows how to control his emotions (without suppressing them) is able to live fully. Aggression only rarely becomes constructive compared to those episodes when it is used in full force.

Teenage aggression

Quite often, psychologists note aggression in childhood. It becomes very bright during adolescence. It is this stage that becomes the most emotional. Teenage aggression can manifest itself towards anyone: peers, parents, animals, younger children. A common cause of aggression is self-affirmation. Showing strength in an aggressive manner seems to be a sign of greatness and power.

Adolescent aggression is a deliberate action aimed at causing harm. Remaining frequent are cases where three parties are involved:

  1. The aggressor is a teenager himself.
  2. The victim is the person at whom the teenager’s aggression is directed.
  3. Spectators are people who can become bystanders or provocateurs that cause aggression in a teenager. They do not participate in the process of manifestation of aggression, but only observe what the aggressor and his victim do.

Teenagers of different genders show aggression in the following ways:

  • The boys tease, trip, fight, and kick.
  • Girls boycott, gossip, and get offended.

The location and age of the aggressor does not matter, since this emotion manifests itself at any time from an early age.

Psychologists explain teenage aggression by the changes that occur during puberty. A former child who has not yet become an adult is afraid of the future, is not ready for responsibility and independence, and does not know how to control his emotional experiences. Relationships with parents, as well as the influence of the media, play a significant role here.

Here are the following types of aggressive teenagers:

  1. Hyperactive, who grew up in a family where everything was allowed to him.
  2. Touchy, characterized by vulnerability and irritability.
  3. Oppositional defiant, who demonstratively opposes people whom he does not consider his authority.
  4. Aggressive-fearful, in which fears and suspicion are manifested.
  5. Aggressively insensitive, who does not have sympathy or empathy.

Male aggression

Men are often the benchmarks of aggression. It seems that women should not be as aggressive as men. However, this feeling is common to everyone. Male aggression often manifests itself in open form. At the same time, the stronger sex does not experience feelings of guilt and anxiety. For them, this emotion is a kind of companion that helps them achieve goals and form a special model of behavior.

Scientists have put forward a theory that male aggression is a genetic factor. In all centuries, men had to conquer territories and lands, wage wars, protect their families, etc. At the same time, representatives of the weaker sex note this quality, which manifests itself in dominance and leadership, as attractive to them.

A modern man has many reasons why aggression manifests itself in him:

  • Dissatisfaction with one's social and financial situation.
  • Lack of culture of behavior.
  • Lack of self-confidence.
  • Lack of other forms of manifestation of one’s independence and strength.

In the current situation, when a man is required to be financially wealthy and successful, while there are practically no opportunities to achieve these statuses, the stronger sex has a high level of anxiety. Every time society reminds a man in various ways of how untenable he is. This is often reinforced by an unsettled personal life or lack of sexual relationships with women.

Men are trained to keep their experiences to themselves. However, aggression comes out, which is a consequence of unsettled life. It is difficult for a man to use all his capabilities in a world where he should be cultured and friendly, since anger and rage are often punished.

Women's aggression

Aggression is often associated with masculine behavior. However, women are also prone to dissatisfaction, which simply manifests itself in slightly different forms. Being a weaker creature than a man, a woman tries to express her aggression a little softly. If the victim seems strong or equal in strength, then the woman's aggression is moderate. If we are talking about a child at whom aggression is directed, then the woman may not restrain herself.

Being a more emotional and social creature, a woman is prone to displaying soft or hidden aggression. Women become more aggressive in old age. Psychologists associate this with dementia and negative character deterioration. At the same time, a woman’s satisfaction with her own life remains important. If she is dissatisfied, unhappy, then her internal tension increases.

Often a woman’s aggressiveness is associated with internal tension and emotional outbursts. A woman, no less than a man, is subject to various restrictions and obligations. She must start a family and give birth to children, always be beautiful and kind. If a woman does not have good reasons for kindness, a man for starting a family and having children, or physiological data for achieving beauty, this significantly oppresses her.

The cause of female aggression is often:

  • Hormonal imbalance.
  • Mental disorders.
  • Childhood traumas, hostility towards mother.
  • Negative experiences with contacts with the opposite sex.

A woman is made dependent on a man from childhood. She must be “married.” And when relationships with the opposite sex do not work out, which is common in modern society, this causes internal tension and dissatisfaction.

Aggression in older people

The most unpleasant and sometimes incomprehensible phenomenon is aggression in older people. Children are raised to “respect their elders” because they are smarter and wiser. Their knowledge helps the world become a better place. However, older people are practically no different from their younger counterparts. Aggression by older people becomes a weak quality that does not inspire respect.

The reason for the aggressiveness of older people is a change in life as a result of social degradation. When a person retires, he loses his previous activity. Here memory decreases, health deteriorates, and the meaning of life is lost. An elderly person feels forgotten, unwanted, lonely. If this is reinforced by a poor existence and lack of interests and hobbies, then the elderly person either becomes depressed or becomes aggressive.

We can call aggression by older people a way of communicating with others, a method of attracting attention to themselves. Here are the following forms of aggression:

  1. Grumpiness.
  2. Irritability.
  3. Opposition to everything new.
  4. Protest attitude.
  5. Groundless accusations and insults.
  6. High propensity for conflicts.

The main problem of older people is loneliness, especially after the death of one of the spouses. If children do not pay much attention to the elderly person, then he feels acute loneliness.

Degeneration or infection of brain cells also affects behavior changes at any age. Since these phenomena mostly occur in old age, doctors first rule out brain diseases as the cause of aggression.

Husband's aggression

In love relationships, the most discussed topic is the aggressiveness of husbands. Because women express their despotism differently, flamboyant displays of male aggression become commonplace. The causes of conflicts and quarrels in the family are:

  1. Unequal distribution of responsibilities.
  2. Dissatisfaction with intimate relationships.
  3. Different understandings of the rights and responsibilities of spouses.
  4. Not meeting your needs in relationships.
  5. Unequal contribution of both parties to the relationship.
  6. Lack of significance and value of a person as a partner.
  7. Financial difficulties.
  8. Inability to solve all emerging problems, their accumulation and periodic disputes because of them.

Many problems can cause aggression in a husband, but the most important are social status, financial wealth and sexual satisfaction. If a man is not satisfied in all plans, then he habitually looks for someone to blame - his wife. She is not sexy enough to want, does not inspire him to make money, does not become his support, etc.

A dissatisfied and insecure man begins to find fault, quarrel, point, and command a woman. In this way he tries to normalize his inferior life. If we analyze the situation, it turns out that aggression in husbands arises on the basis of their complexes and inadequacy, and not because of their wives.

The mistake women with aggressive husbands make is that they try to improve the relationship. It is the husbands who must correct the situation, not the women. Here wives make the following mistakes:

  • They talk about their hopes and fears, which further convinces their husbands that they are weak.
  • They share their plans, which gives their husbands another reason to criticize them.
  • They share their successes, expecting their husbands to rejoice at them.
  • They try to find common topics for conversation, but are faced with silence and coldness.

Treatment of aggression

The treatment of aggression does not mean medicinal elimination of the problem, but psychological one. Only in rare cases are tranquilizers and antidepressants used, which can calm the nervous system. However, a person will never completely get rid of aggressive behavior. Therefore, the treatment of aggression means developing skills to control it and understand the current situation.

If aggression is directed at you, you must understand that you are not obliged to tolerate attacks. Even if we are talking about your husband/wife or children, you still remain a person who has the right to be treated with kindness and care. The situation becomes especially painful when it comes to aggressive behavior of parents towards children. This is a situation in which the victim is almost never able to resist the pressure.

No one is obliged to endure other people's attacks. Therefore, if you become the object of someone’s aggression, you can safely fight back by any means. If you yourself are an aggressor, then this problem is yours personally. Here it is necessary to carry out exercises to eliminate one’s own aggressiveness.

Firstly, the causes of the aggression should be recognized. Nothing happens for nothing. Even mentally ill people have reasons to be aggressive. What moment was the trigger that made you feel angry? After realizing the cause of your negative emotions, you should take steps to change your attitude towards the situation.

The second point is that the reason must be devalued or eliminated. If you need to change your personal attitude towards a situation, then you should do it; If you need to solve a problem (for example, eliminate dissatisfaction), then you should make an effort and be patient.

You should not fight your own aggression, but understand the reasons for its occurrence, since eliminating these reasons allows you to cope with any negative emotions.

Forecast

The result of any emotion is a certain event that becomes decisive. Anything can be a predictor of the consequences of aggression:

  1. Losing connections with good people.
  2. Divorce or separation from a loved one.
  3. Dismissal from work.
  4. Unsettled life.
  5. Lack of support from important people.
  6. Lack of understanding.
  7. Loneliness, etc.

In some cases, the question even arises about the life expectancy of the person who enters into conflict. When physical violence occurs in the family or in the company of hooligans, it can result in death.

If a person does not try to control his aggressive impulses, he will face various negative consequences. His environment will consist only of people who should not be trusted. Only an aggressive person can be close to the same aggressor.

The consequences of controlling one's own aggression can be successful. Firstly, a person will not spoil relationships with those who are dear to him. I really want to throw out my emotions and show my character. However, if you understand what the consequences may be, it is better to prevent an undesirable outcome.

Secondly, a person can channel aggression into a constructive direction. You cannot get rid of this emotion, but you can subjugate it. For example, aggression is good when a person is dissatisfied with an unachieved goal. In this case, he wants to make every effort to realize his plans.

If a person cannot cope with his aggression on his own, then he should consult a psychologist. He will help you find the right answers to your questions, as well as develop a behavior strategy that will help you pacify aggression and take the right actions in the right situations.