A dark look at KVN by Konstantin Raven. A dark look at the premiere finale

In September 2015, the author and founder of the Krasnodar KVN team “Vyatka” Konstantin Voronchikhin spoke unflatteringly about the team of the “Kazakhs” team on his website Voronlinch.ru.

Hello, Konstantin! HSE finals 2010... don't you think the Kazakhs fully deserved the championship? The business card, of course, has a couple of slacks compared to Bak, but other competitions (and especially stem) are much better than the others (IMHO). So why do you think Buck and not them?

- Listen, how interesting is it for you to delve into some of the wilds of the KVnovsky past, and even argue about it? Rewatch the first seasons of “Battle of Psychics” if you lack such intrigue in your life. There is probably a lot of controversy there too. And now briefly, regarding the Kazakhs and the BAC. The entire amik and editor were happy when the Kazakhs left, because they were the laziest of the teams. And by that time Krasnodar was already a humor machine. Where are those Kazakhs now? Who are they writing to? What shows are they participating in? And Krasnodar residents are everywhere. Those Kazakhs would never have won the final because they had nothing to do with it, they are just a great foil for any champions.

This statement caused a storm of discussion in the spaces of Kaznet, and people like Yaroslav Melekhin (source - Qostanay.tv) and Olzhas Rymbaev (in an interview for the newspaper) even commented on the “accusations of laziness” on Voronchikhin’s part.

A short introduction from the editor:
These tips were not written for the “KVN for Everyone” website, so the vocabulary is sometimes harsher than is customary here. But this happens in KVN, they just don’t show it on TV. We ask that hypersensitive people do not read it, for everyone we post it as is without edits.

How to play warm-up? How do you play warm-up?

To play the warm-up game, it needs to be trained. But don’t brainwash yourself and your friends, but play for an hour before a rehearsal or assault, as often as possible. We play like this, everyone tells me something, I choose a version, or come up with it myself. It is very important to have mutual understanding between the one who forms the final version and the one who runs to the microphone.

Each team has its own secrets and tricks. General tips are:
1. don't go after the bolt. Any of the teams had a bolt, stop, after the bolt you won’t be able to come in.
2. don’t go to the last warm-up question with controversial shit.
3. Don't be rude to the jury members.
4. remain silent in a circle that is not on business.
5. give one two-syllable versions.
6. start playing the warm-up game about 10 minutes before the warm-up.
7. don't piss, try to get high.
8. listen to other people’s answers so as not to mess up with the same hat again.
9. Don’t keep written rubrics; whatever pops up in your head, use those.
10. Choose the boss, and scold him only after you have lost.

Lightness and relaxation in the warm-up give training. Before the start of the assault, 1520 minutes (this is without writing questions, you need at least 50 questions). It is better to play a warm-up on the topic of a warm-up, knowing the members of the jury, etc. During the training process, jokes, answers, constructions, universal excuses, rubbers, good preparations will appear, which can then be completed in a couple of seconds before the answer. Confidence will appear. It will become clear which of the participants is littering the gum with their “oh, you can come up with something about Pushkin” or bringing black stuff into the circle. Such people must be taken out of the circle, given 12 warnings, if they do not correct themselves, they must be taken out.

And there is one more rule I came up with. Don't answer the truth. Lie during the warm-up, and immediately in the version given by everyone. Because one of the most common mistakes is to answer a question, not joke, but answer, it’s barely funny, but, oh, they answered. This is melancholy and UG. When warming up, you should always take risks, just determine in advance the degree and zones of risk for yourself.

I’m not asking for advice, I just wanted to ask for a long time: where do ideas for numbers come from (how are they born). especially delusional ones. here the OMS had a video about the bee-horse. HOW can you come to this? Can you use a specific example?)

I’ll explain the bee horse specifically. There was a technical assignment (creative task) for a video competition from amik music video, any music, but remade, my own words, video self-filming. It happened in my kitchen at Garibaldi in Moscow, two weeks before the quarterfinals of the 2010 premiere. Bush arrived and we sat down to think. A working option was the computer game Mario, to make another toy by analogy with Mortal. The gags were already sketched out. But this is not a musical one, we tried to write a Mario song into words cal of the world, we decided to leave it for now and come up with something simpler. The music doesn't let you listen to the text, which means fuck the music. This is how the idea of ​​an acapella song came about. And there are not many well-known versions of acapella; this is how the horse appeared. We decided that the video series would be about a horse, a bee, then sausages appeared, in general, the initial versions were funny, maybe I’ll find it and post it. And then, in order for this nonsense to be funny, it was necessary to place absurd characters in real conditions. For example, the streets of Moscow. Then a lot of editing, and the result. Moreover, it can be made in a bunch of versions, because gags are easy to come up with, the video is always funny, because... reality Nature.

and another question... you have some kind of censor (besides the editors) to whom you read a joke or show the number, and he makes a verdict: funny or not funny. Or are you independent in this regard and don’t need outside views?)

We don’t always listen to editors, but we have our own feelings. Most often, humor is tested on friends and family. Moreover, their assessment is not important - you could convey the idea incorrectly, choose the wrong words, the person could misunderstand, in the wrong mood, of a different age. Your own assessment is important, because when you voice written humor for the first time, you understand much more about what is missing than the person opposite. Well, if it’s torn, then go ahead!

What is the correct way or how would you advise to break up the greeting script?
Well, it is clear that each scenario is individual and depends a lot on the team’s concept, but still there are some general principles. For example, the strongest at the beginning and at the end, etc.

I can recommend a rule - the entire performance without sagging and 34 tears per business card. The higher the level. the stronger the gaps. down to minute waves. First to the beginning, first and second joke. The second one immediately follows, or through a joke to consolidate the effect. Skip the next middle 2 on them. Then break. Then the final number is a monologue block, then the last break. Then a clever thought that actually explains who you are. But if you can put together such a performance and know how to determine whether it’s a bolt or a sag on a sheet or at a rehearsal, then you don’t need my advice.

There is another technique. It's not very funny to begin with, but it's interesting. Stupid blocks, pauses, and pens are suitable for this. Thus, the bar of humor is lowered, but there is no disgust because... It’s interesting for a while (about 20 seconds), then steps start, jokes start, numbers increase and it gets funnier. This form of presentation can be broken later, unfolded, but it is always memorable. But this requires more serious drama and is more risky. Vyatka’s business cards also partly belong to this style. And the control system was more design-oriented. That is, it is clear that the golden mean is in combinations. There is also the construction of a business card based on tempo. First, a slow exit is installed. Then the greeting is the beginning of 12 jokes. Then very short miniatures with an ever-increasing tempo, with the same beat from the same melody, but from different parts, with development, as it were. By the word faster, I mean not the speed of speech, but the speed of the onset of the denouement. Such an “overclocking” block should have three miniatures. The first one is short.

Oh, San, why do you have an mp3 player?

(PRESSES MANY TIMES ON AN IMAGINARY THING HANGING ON HIS NECK) Does he catch blue tuff? Does it read DVDs? is there wifi? Let me download some tunes for you?

- (WHEEZING AND FALLING) This is a cardiac stimulant...
This one is short, the second one is even shorter. The third approach is longer, but the twist is the strongest of the three.
And after this accelerating block, you can have at least a short breeze, at least a doodle, at least a number with a slow start... Well, then what’s written...

On what basis should you arrange jokes for biathlon?

In biathlon everything is simpler. It all depends. How many stupid bolts do you have in your opinion (better than the tested ones), how many jokes are so-so (that is, if there was something to replace, I would replace them), and how many jokes are a la nonsense (or stupid, they say nonsense about them). It should be set like this. 1- Bolt. If the first two are bolt bolt. And then the strongest ones in descending order. If in the biathlon circle they read 2 jokes, then it’s better to put bolt nonsense. If there are three, then the average bolt nonsense. There is no such nonsense: Bolt average Bolt. You don’t need to take the bolts to the end, it’s better to use nonsense. Always have a couple of jokes more than is required in order to set your opponent up for a penalty loop or simply change a joke during the competition if your opponent had something similar, or realized that it won’t work today. But for this you need to have experience and balls of iron. And it’s also very important everywhere, but especially in biathlon, not to stumble on a joke, even if the bolt still doesn’t go in.

What assault methods can you recommend or which ones do you use?

There are several types of assaults. At the very beginning of preparation for games or concerts, when they come up with the numbers themselves and the concept of competitions, a big assault with all their might is useful. It defines the lines that can be developed: a number about Lenin in confession, a scene about the wedding of the King Kongs, etc.. There you can already storm in groups, working out the line, in twos, in threes. He’s not eager to change. Then the report. Most effectively, it lasts for an hour. Then, when the number needs to be knocked down, reduced into a ready-made version with a reserve, this is done by one person - either the main author of the team, or the next one in the author's adequacy-hierarchy after him. There is collective creativity there. And if you have a team of three people, then everything is the same, but slower and in order. There are also classic assaults for biathlon, block jokes when the serve is clear, etc.. 47 people sit down. They take one leaf at a time. Write at the top of the topic sheet. Each sheet has its own, if some topics need to be closed urgently or they are more important, there are two sheets for such a number or move. The first lap is given 15 minutes. Everyone is absolutely silent! They write jokes, preferably complete reprises, gags, turns, steps, whatever comes up for this number. Then they pass it on. Then the same scheme for another 5 transmissions of 10 minutes each, so that in the end there is an hour of assault; only a few can think effectively further. Then everyone smokes, the main author collects all the sheets and briefly runs through. Everyone gathers again, the main author reads out the sheets, in order, topic by topic. The funny is sought, discussed, and noted. The main author takes, enters, collects the number. If there is a shortage somewhere, and there are still numbers that need to be filled with “meat,” the assault is repeated again. With reading and discussion it takes 3 hours, more than 4 a day is unrealistic. The rest of the day is filled with rehearsals or verbal assaults in groups. They disperse in groups of 23 for one to two hours, each group must do a task on ideas for new numbers.

And something about music? Can you tell me the number, if it’s not difficult? What is the main thing, what is the musical idea, how to find it?

Music number. There are several important points here. 1. Who can sing? Not like in the yard or at karaoke, but in such a way that the text is understandable and funny. 2. Who can write songs? Same principle. 3. Who knows how to play something?
And if no one has the answer to all these questions, then the well-known problems of the KVNist arise - how to come up with a number and then make it musical. This is how interviews with the group, scribbles, etc. appear.
In fact, as everywhere else, you need to do not what is required, but what works out. Musicality is everywhere you can’t sing there are formats of ditties, blues, rap, where you can focus on the text and comedy.
In any performance, you must know what the team’s strengths are and show this side. Vyatka has a text, and we try to make all the numbers, homework, and stems so that the text is followed.
And further. half the effect of a number is often made by the music. The more hit and iconic it is, the more chances it has to make a BANG.

We need to collect all your messages here and publish the book “Guide to playing KVN from Raven”)

not enough for leadership. I describe only what worked before my eyes, or did not work. experienced mercenaries know more technologies, but young teams are always creative with something new, so let it be JS live advice)

The second part of the correspondence between me and the readers of the site, which I am posting. It’s impossible to post all the questions and answers at once; there are about 50 pages. Why am I doing this? Where should I put this?

In addition, there is no normal textbook on KVN, I don’t take Marfin and Chivurin’s book into account, there is a lot of useful stuff there, you need to read it, but it’s about the theory of KVN, and most often you need practical solutions to problems. I know about some of these solutions, and I share them with those who do not yet know. So to speak, a simulation experience. Vocabulary and everything else in the questions has been preserved whenever possible.

Kostya, do you write better in a team or alone?

I always write better alone. And I believe that any person works best alone. But there are moments, lines, dead ends, when one cannot break through, then there is a general assault. Or when we come up with speech intonation for the characters, if this is not a parody, it also needs to be heard and seen. But in general, in most cases, a screenwriter is a solitary profession, because one story, one package of characters and the development of this plot live only in the head that came up with it. In another head it will be different, so if you want the product to be yours at least in the text and idea, then write it alone. KVN also gives rise to such a disease as the fear of writing alone. You definitely need to lock yourself in a crowd, laugh, instead of taking on the topic, write to the network every two hours and come up with ideas at home. In a crowd there is less responsibility; everyone is always drawn to 12 people. Who are active and interested. But fun for everyone. I've become more about efficiency than fun over the years. Therefore, I participate in assaults only when in some project you need to break through to where one could not, or when you are assaulting with a team so that they also learn techniques.

What is the best game to play in a regional game?

The stronger the team, the more we should take it. You write a lot of text think about how to present it. You don't need a dumbass for this. The regional league is no different from any other league, if it’s funny people will laugh. Just try to act original. Will explain. If there are 6 teams performing, and one is wearing red cloaks, then it will be remembered 5 times more than the others initially. If it’s bad, nothing will save her, but if it’s good, she’ll be immediately remembered and everyone will say that she has her own style. Instead of a red cape, there may be sitting on chairs, a semi-invalid character on the way out, three of us dancing at chops, the presence of only two blondes on stage, etc.. A lot has already happened, so you need to surprise. But the main thing is to make people laugh. Therefore, originality should enhance your team strengths, and not come from God knows where, just to be original.

Hm. How can young KVN members develop a sense of humor to a level above “tits and pussy”?) Otherwise, in my opinion, this is precisely what they have problems with.

You need to write a lot, driving yourself into the KVN format of blackness and oldness. Now KVN has the freshest humor, thanks to editing and the number of teams. You can make funny jokes about tits and pussies, but being young you don’t understand the boundaries, so it’s better not to get involved at all for the first 2 years. And watch other formats of humor: the Fry and Laurie show, Eddie Izzard, Monty Python, The Big Bang Theory, and many projects. Watch a lot of KVN so that the structures of the jokes are deposited. Try to expand your vocabulary, but write in a language you can speak. The number of words in a joke should be minimal to sufficiently convey the paradox. Nah...I told myself. In short, whoever wants to, will learn, here even talent can be compensated for by perseverance to some level. Write a lot, write in different ways: general assaults, homework assignments, jokes to yourself on LJ, alterations of songs, a story, a parody, a play, etc.. Where it is not clear how read the analogues and look at the sources. The knowledge will not be superfluous, the experience will still be useful, and, perhaps, where it will take you, your main purpose will be found, and with it your future profession.

How to work correctly with editors and how, in principle, should the team behave during editing? Should you dump all the material at once or carry it gradually, starting from medium to strong?

Editors are people who want to help anyway. the injustice of their attitude is always subjective and is connected both with tastes in humor and with the fact that in addition to helping you, they make a common product into which your team fits. Therefore, if you want to have the best places in the order of performance, push the editors and make the finale powerful and pathetic. And so on every moment, they are people everywhere. The main thing is to immediately show them the finished product or something as similar to it as possible, on feet, of course. Moreover, cut into a normal size, because due to the effect of prolongation or overload, you will lose some of the possibly funny jokes that came at the end, and your attention has already dissipated. Don’t be afraid, if you have a superbolt in the archives, they won’t pass it by. By the way, also prepare reserves by sections, reserves for codes, for beginnings, for interruptions, for mass numbers, etc.. A show on feet at the first stages of editing can be replaced by a show of two authors who will convey the tempo and intonation.

For example, since what year have you been playing, write?

I started playing at the end of 98, and writing since 99.

How to place gags in a video clip? What to pay attention to and what is the main thing? And in general, any advice on this competition, if it’s not too difficult...

The video competition has different rules for different topics. Example music video competition. The main thing there is the choice of music and the development of the video sequence. Example the horse and the bee OMS, where the music is removed so as not to interfere with the text and video sequence, this case was described in this topic already. If the video competition is a story about the city, then you need text, you need to remove the music, and make the video to match the text. Gags are best placed on musical strong beats, the strongest at the ends of dramatically important parts. Any work consists of 3 parts: beginning, development, denouement, one way or another, they are in any business card, video or stem. The most powerful gags should be placed in the most climactic places, most often at the end of these parts. In addition to the code, there should be the main idea of ​​the video at the end. Gags should not describe what is said in a parallel joke, but simply be on the same topic. Except for musical ones, where the words describe the gag, if possible, funny.

Breeze. how best to write. what topics to choose?

Breeze is a KVnov invention and not very useful for personal development. It killed such a genre in kvn as monologue. Meaningful, ideological, dramatic, and therefore funny, requiring strong actors and text writers, and, as a result, developing. Breeze is a set of jokes with a straight face on one topic. Recently, so-called “situational breezes” have proven their effectiveness. That is, one idea is given and steps are added to it. The idea could be “phrases you never want to hear in life” or “tabloid headlines.” The trick is that due to the high density, the quality of each step is not necessarily perfect; there is a need for delirium in order to shock a person’s ears and return attention to the breeze. And most importantly, even if every third one comes, it will still be a bolt breeze. And having the opportunity to make humor for different audiences, since two out of three are acceptable as risky, makes such a breeze universal for any hall. It is arranged like this. First come the steps that most accurately describe the situation, but not very short or two bolts. Example “in phrases” Will you pay the bill for me? ... Dear, I’m having some delay, along the way... The example of “yellow press” is just two short bolts, the most stereotypical on the topic of scandalous headlines. Standard requirements for the first steps are cleanliness and clarity. Then, increasing the pace, you can throw funny steps in different sequences, placing two stops along the text, so that if you read and don’t go, quickly slide onto such a bolt and then continue throwing steps on the ascent, then they will start to climb. And two steps before the end, the last bolt. In phrases like “Good!” The yellow one is the bomb, or two or three in a row are very funny, but not mega. Coda conclusion or step that allows you to get applause. In the case of the phrases “We’ll be back”... for the yellowjack the code is a thought. Why did I look at two examples, because in the first one it’s purely an idea, but in the second one you still need to write bolts. But all these are not monologues, since it is not acting that is required, but the most correct intonation when transmitting the text. There are other breezes, old-fashioned ones, where a person tells a story. A thread could be one day in the life…. and by the hour. 8.00, 9.20... There may be a problem breeze I don't understand, or I want to become mayor. Maybe figurative, Robin Hood today, Columbus forgive me. These are already monologues, because there is empathy. A monologue will always fuck the breeze with the same level of text, but good acting.

Evil night. My question is: how did the Dark Army come into being? How difficult/easy was it to decide on this style? Something was already visible in the control system, but still)

We came to Sochi, I had a rest and showed my wife KVN, and Bush tried to find a team called SUO, and performed in the first round as SUO. That is, there was only a script, a concept and a Commander in my jacket. So to speak, we used the SLA rating. But in Sochi, it was no longer the SLA that was taken to the Premiere, but Bush personally with his pitch and the idea of ​​a new team - the Army of Darkness. The name could have been anything, it so happened that they promised us a warm homeland, and we became Vyatka again. And if you dig into the idea further, then Fantômas was first invented in 2005 - a cosmic image that is rude to those whom everyone has always wanted. The idea was mine, the first Fantômas was written together with Vovka Volkovysky. It immediately became clear that Bush would do this. He toughened him up a little and made him more boorish, which only benefited him. At the same time there was a project by the Fantômas team, only the generals should be in gray suits and black turtlenecks, everyone in black gloves, a couple of people had old-fashioned remote controls with an antenna, greased hair, combed back. Everything is like in the movie. But the idea is the same - to take over this world. There was nowhere to apply the idea. Fantômas was already hanging out in clubs, and in Borscht. Then the SLA. Then Bush in Voronezh. And now everything has grown together. Army of Evil is a trend now. look at all the big movie posters take over the world, save the world, superheroes and comics.

Somehow it turns out that I’m more drawn to some kind of cosmic acceleration, which is at odds with the way of thinking of the other team members. What do you recommend in this case?

As for your space, which goes against the team’s opinion, that’s normal. Everyone wants to play in space, but everyone wants results and TV, where it’s more difficult to break into space.
I must say that I do not consider Vyatka’s style to be space. Now there is a trend not of space, but of conceptual projects Golos, Vyatka, SOK, Goty. The humor there is not cosmic, but ordinary or literary, but the concept is deeper than just a KVN team. It is more difficult to play conceptual KVN, because it requires a certain class in authorship and acting experience.
And everything that differs from cases is usually called space. In your case, excuse the pun, within the team you can come up with a cosmic image for your exit, a la Sokol or Demis, which may not become a central, but memorable figure. come up with your own idea, write down the walker (3 exits, where the last breakdown or the funniest one is). It will be funny everyone will laugh, it won’t be funny it’s your own fault. If you use this example to show your friends that you understand what you are doing, then you will move them a little in your direction.

Hello. (no matter how stupid it may sound.) We were looking for a concept as a team. And finally we found it. We call ourselves the most arrogant team. BUT. Very often we compare ourselves with the OMS and Vyatka. Something similar happens. So here it is. Can you tell me some tips on the style of the arrogant team? And how to write a completely linear speech? Are there any secrets of yours?

I don’t quite understand what brazen is and how it creates a style. If you have the audacity to do everything the wrong way, but across the board, without sound, with your back to the audience, hold the microphones backwards, start from the snot or from the middle. But there is a risk of being more original than funny. In addition, extreme impudence is rudeness, so there is a risk of going too far. A concept is good when it allows you to make ordinary things extraordinary. If you give an example of impudence here, it will be easier to understand.

2Well, we only played one game. The business card only stated that it was the most arrogant. They said that the presenter was not announcing us correctly... In the stem, one said: “I’ll announce for now, and you take out the chairs. - I won’t carry them, carry them yourself.” - And I won’t carry them.” We stood there for a little while, then another person brought out the chairs . “Well, let’s announce it! did you take out the chairs? just sit there and announce” well, that’s all the stem, they say we don’t have a stem and they showed it.
We are thinking about leaving (by agreement with the host) out of turn or something like that.
I would also like to say that we are gods, and behind the scenes we are pathetic people, but immediately associations with the OMS….
We think what else can be said...

What you described is not arrogance, but conflict and stubbornness. A proud team, if anything, touchy, but not arrogant. And certainly, this is not the team’s style or concept, this is just a move to play. There are millions of similar moves:
1. let's choose who is the captain why are you? I won't be under you, etc.
2. Why are we judged by the jury, and not we them...
3. Why is the business card so long, why is there so much to talk about, nothing happens...
This style is called we climb into any hole we can reach.
The downside of such moves is that it’s a little unfunny, and immediately offensive and unjustified, immediately points down.
I already wrote that style should facilitate, insure, help, and not just be risky, original and cool.

As before, I respond online, usually within 23 days,

Installation of KVN games. The invincible weapon of critics in the comments, the talk of the town, the sword of Damocles hanging over Amik in the frail teenage hands. So, I was pleased with the editing of the premiere finale. Perhaps there were common mistakes in specific scenes, but the overall feeling from the broadcast is for once better than from the game itself. Especially when it comes to homework. There was no such reaction from the audience as in the fire, the sound was increased. Vice versa. There was a slight feeling of awkwardness at the game; almost everything was sagging and not working - it was painful and tortured. But on air they trimmed some things, cleaned them up, it became smoother, I even liked the parts. On the business card, perhaps, only the actors and loudcats had their numbers cut out - spitting and chicken cartilage were not included on the air. In general, hygienic censorship coincided with the reaction of the audience.

As a result, the opinion about a weak ending in the KVnov environment is dominant today, although, I repeat, the broadcast does not prove this. Yes, not a blast, not a bolt store, not bursting the belly-heads of the audience, but finals are rarely like that. The stakes are different, the hall is different, and the jury is different at the premiere. Well, just imagine that the entire number of topics, tricks, nonsense and the depth of paradoxes are limited to what Navka will understand. Basically, this is a test for the average person. Nagiyev, of course, was also not the standard of comedy, but at least he has been in KVN for a long time, he understands some things, and he likes things that are bolder. And despite the fact that the final of the premiere is a test for compliance with the tower, it is also a monitoring of the knowledge gained in the premiere. And this is what this monitoring showed.

Nobody except the Actors and Shurochka moved anywhere. Not towards the tower, not at all. Shurochka moved from purely everyday observers and strange old women to relevant and formatted humor. The finale's calling card is proof of this. Yes, everything is not new, yes, there were no super-breaks, yes, in the final number, again, it was not the guest stars themselves who joked, but the guest stars, but if compared to the eighth group, they became more mature. The entertainer even told a joke; perhaps they'll give him a funny one soon. Maybe that's the ceiling for a given cast or a given concept without a concept. Perhaps it was an author's mistake, or an editing error - making a video for homework is more than a strange idea for the final competition of the final game of the season. This is immediately permission for the jury members to bet as much as they want in order to crown someone else as the winner.

The actors also show development, although theirs is more false. It's in the archives. Even in the final they had numbers from the archive, just bad ones. Closer to the beginning of the season, they did simpler things, but, having reached the finals, they built a nest of absurdity there. I love this, but I want others to be happy next to you. In the business card in the hall they began to enter only with a code. Even at the laughter marathon, the reaction was very uneven with a messy ending. They win on TV; half of their mini-humour, scattered throughout the action, simply doesn’t have time to be read in the audience. After all, in the finale, Navka was not the only one who came to watch the premiere for the first time. The premiere hall is more provincial due to the large number of fans of the teams. Not trusting the Moscow audience, and doing the right thing, KVN distributes large portions of tickets among the teams. I must say that, if the team is working properly, a lot of fans come. Plus KVN players, that is, there are almost no ordinary Moscow spectators. A little more at the end. But it can’t be compared to a tower. And provincial spectators, especially those who support their team, will not strain to understand what the Actors or Electroshock are saying.

Actors, in general, do not play the acting concept. More precisely, everything they do to support their concept does not work. Reconsider Cheetah. And they come in and it’s a blast to get long delusional runs, tied to the concept with the source material. We take some crack in the film and piss in it until we get a river that brings jokes. A very convenient and fresh format, accompanied by a light St. Petersburg flair. The front is a clear leader who is dragging along, but the rest are not sagging either, having their own mules. That's why Electroshock is not in the tower. Without emphasizing their St. Petersburg background, without bearing anything on the “rest” of the team members, Vanya and Anya (forgive me if I confuse them) did not turn into a battering ram, sweeping away everything in their path. In the business card, Electrshock makes a drum out of miniatures, without playing on that field in any way. At least some kind of breakdown. Like, and now the miniature is “a man announces the miniature” and so on - in general, the miniatures are inferior to the actors’ acceleration in terms of freshness and angle of fire. Over all the years of the existence of KVN and Comedy, miniature fire has destroyed 99% of comical situations, or even more. Electroshock is good at accelerating miniatures (such as a chair moved far away), but, apparently, they are difficult to write, unlike the “teacher in a taxi” that is filled with their business card, and which even Volzhans can show. Therefore, of the two St. Petersburg players, the fresh one wins, and this is a shame, because the duo Vanya-Bogdan (and I hope the Buns don’t win this season) would clearly have graced HSE 2019.

A strong duet does not make a strong team - this rule is confirmed by the Dudikovs. Yes, a couple continues to come up with a funny joke for the competition, but the rest of the team is not working. Here's some simple advice. Let it be not the father and son who are being substituted, but the team. Now the couple must appear in funny images and fight off the presenting commands with jokes. Or you can do so that the team takes a fresh, current number in the substituted props, makeup, extras, music, and the father and son come out and joke about this phenomenon. For example, a team in black sings “the color of mood is black”, the Dudikovs come out and joke about Russian rap, Kikorov, Timati, Khabib and so on. And the last number of the business card is the opposite. This is simple advice. And difficult advice - look for more concepts, images - you can also change the rest of the team. And the line that the son is the boyfriend of the girl on the team doesn’t have to be dropped as soon as it appears. Miniatures are not as interesting to watch as a series about a shell-shocked family. Find them a mother or sister. In your format, you understand how to write, now you need to think about formats. Including to do good plot homework in home competitions, and not COPs modified for the conditions of the game.

The situation is similar with the Thundercats. Yes, they learned to write business cards from scratch, leaking the entire archive in eighth. But they learned to write something that is not what the tower needs. They will laugh at them in the tower, Nikita will push them, they will make their greeting cheerful. But not winning. Because they never pulled out a star, didn’t speculate on patriotism or women, didn’t go beyond the characters, didn’t try anything other than humor, which means they basically don’t want to use cheating moves. However, the same Romeo and Juliet, for all its unfunnyness, is just pure cheating when you merge a world-famous cultural phenomenon with your goat seed. And due to this you receive whists from the audience and the jury. They won the season, I think they deserved it, congratulations to them, well done. But let's continue to spread them.

The fact that the homework turned out to be unfunny, but the business card is funny, suggests that you just need to play the homework differently. This problem, by the way, affects all teams. I had a chance to work a little on the finals, and here's what I noticed. Teams want homework to be played according to the rules of the card. It consisted of only jokes, miniatures with minimal transitions. That’s why everyone’s plots look crumpled and strange. The main thing in a dramatic work, that is, in anything longer than one and a half minutes, is the story. Whatever shell you take, you need a story. It would be nice for the Actors team to team up with the Playwrights team. Even when making fun of a story, you need to tell your story, and not just switch scenes with a remote control that has only two buttons: puns and nonsense.

The Dudikovs took a theme that suited the images and broke it in the very first sentence. Where are the Fathers and Sons? Where is Kirsanov, where is Bazarov, why did you say that you are smart? This is what the audience and the jury are thinking at this moment. Where is the clash between two positions expressed in the plot? What is the goal of the heroes? And in the end, instead of dramaturgy, scenography. Instead of turning, people come out and move to the other side of the stage. We fight static with stupidity. Electric shock right there. What's fresh about Friends? Not a single joke from that context, at least the laughter behind the scenes would have been played up. Why Sokol? You are from St. Petersburg, he is from the Urals, and as a result, the aroma of stylish St. Petersburg depression, which always emanated from Electroshock, turned into an amber from a mixture of absinthe and cheburek.

And finally, about unfulfilled favorites. Elista never came out of her mayoral shell, which obviously won’t last for four competitions in the tower. They were supposed to win, but they leaked the business card, trying to pass off the enthusiasm as a text. Plus, Shurochka dropped off, who squeezed out all the applause that the audience had put aside in support of the teams, and not their humor. Automatically protecting the final teams from the new, adult, unfamiliar and scary jury headed by Vasilich, the audience gave Shurochka the whole business card, regardless of the quality of the performances. And when Elista came out, the audience was like, “Well, well, now, finally, we won’t clap, but laugh,” and they didn’t clap. And the Kalmyks decided to traditionally pump things up at the beginning, and then they installed a “teacher from a vocational school”, who is fiendish, then a long, unfunny China, and now the business card almost went through without a bolt, and the hall became sad. The last number raised it a little, but did not straighten out the overall feeling. The electric shock that followed only reinforced the feeling of the pit.

Summarizing the season, we can say that once again the premiere caught a lot of smart teams, original formats, but in the end no one was ready for the finals at the tower. So, maybe they shouldn’t be prepared for the tower this season? Maybe make a super cup, where the three best tower teams play the three best premier teams in a Special Project. One competition for 10 minutes, plus a warm-up, but this is an adult hall, a tower hall, so to speak, getting to know the teams, strong opponents, dense editing. And to finish the season with the jury, which sat all season, to let the teams fool around with what they want and what they have the material for. Make long business cards for the final, which should include a block of 10 biathlon jokes, assessed separately. After the rope, KVN can withstand any perversion. The main thing is to move, develop, try. This is what I wish for all the finalists of the premiere. No worries in Sochi. Break us!

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