Several days have passed since I returned from camp. December

Ten days have passed since I wrote my diary. What happened? It is difficult to collect all the events, especially since everything was difficult, and much more new and difficult things were revealed to me. I'll try to remember everything.

On December 2, I attended the Beethoven Evening concert. Auer and d'Albert played four sonatas with the violin. The pleasure was complete, and my soul calmed down for a while. But the next day I saw an advertisement in the newspapers from the Northern Messenger about L.N.'s article. In addition, Tanya quarreled with me, reproaching me for my imaginary relationship with S.I., and I had not seen him for a month before. I was terribly offended; my family always knows how to make me guilty without guilt if I, as I have done all my life, do not serve slavishly and submit to all demands family, but I’ll choose my own path, just as I have now chosen to study music. And it’s my fault!

The next day a telegram was received from Dora and Leva that they were going, nothing from L.N.

I was so impatiently waiting for L.N., I was so ready to write to him, to serve him in every possible way, to love him, not to cause him any grief, not to see S.I., if it hurt him so much that the news that after a month of separation he doesn’t come to me, and even publishes an article in S.V., brought me into a state of extreme despair. I packed my things and decided to go somewhere. When I got on the cab, I still didn’t know where I was going. I arrived at the St. Petersburg station, wanted to go to St. Petersburg, to take the article away from Gurevich; but she came to her senses and went to Trinity. In the evening, alone, in a hotel, with one candle in a dirty room, I sat petrified and experienced all the bitterness of reproaches to my husband, who was indifferent to my life and love. I wanted to console myself that at almost 70 years old it is no longer possible to feel passionately; but why the deception and secret relations and articles in S.V. from me? I thought I was going crazy.

When I lay down and fell asleep, I was woken up by the nanny and Tanya’s voices and a knock on the door. For some reason Tanya guessed that it was I who went to Trinity, became concerned and came to me. I was very touched, but my state of despair did not change. Tanya informed me about the arrival of Dora and Leva and that L.N. was coming the next day. And it didn’t touch me at all. I waited too long and fervently for him, and then something broke in me again, and I became painfully indifferent to everything.

Tanya left, and I went to mass. I spent the whole day (nine hours) in church. I fervently prayed not to commit suicide or revenge for all the pain my husband constantly caused me; I prayed for humility, for a miracle that would make our relationship with my husband completely truthful, loving, trusting; I prayed for the healing of my sick soul.

My confession was before God, since the elder, the schema-monk Fyodor, was so decrepit that he did not even understand my words; he sobbed constantly from nervousness and weakness. There was something very mysterious, poetic in this retreat; in stone passages, cells, ordinary people, monks wandering everywhere, in prayers, long services and complete solitude among a crowd of worshipers who did not know me. Having returned, in the evening I read for a long time the rules and prayers from the book located in the hotel. The next morning I took communion in the Refectory Church. It was a royal day (December 6) and a sumptuous lunch was being prepared for the monastery: four fish dishes, beer, honey. Dishes: tin plates and mugs; there are tablecloths on the tables, novices in white aprons serve.

Then, after standing the prayer service, I went to wander around the Lavra. The gypsy woman caught up with me in the square: “The blond man loves you, but he doesn’t dare; you are an eminent lady, a high position, developed, educated, and he is not of your line... Give me 1 rub. 6 hryvnia, I’ll cast a spell: when following me, everyone knows Marya Ivanovna, their home. I'll put a spell on him, he'll love you like a husband...

I felt creepy and wanted to take a love spell from her. But when I returned home, I crossed myself and realized how stupid and sinful it was.

Returning to my room, I felt sad. The telegram that I was expecting from Tanya about L.N.’s arrival did not arrive. After eating, I went to the telegraph office, and there were two unsent telegrams: one from Tanya, the other long, touching from L.N., who called me home.

I immediately went to the train.

At home, Lev Nikolaevich met me with tears in his eyes in the hallway. We just rushed towards each other. He agreed (mentioning this through Tanya in the telegram) not to publish articles in Severny Vestnik, and I promised him quite sincerely not to see S.I. on purpose and to serve L.N. and take care of him, and do everything for his happiness I am at peace.

We spoke so well, it was so easy for me to promise him everything, I loved him so much and passionately and am ready to love him...

And today in his diary it is written that I am for the first time, and that it is joyful!!.. My God! Help me get through this! Again, before future generations, we need to make ourselves _m_u_ch_e_n_i_k_o_m, and me _v_i_n_o_v_a_t_o_y! What's the difference? L.N. was angry that Uncle Kostya and I came in a month ago to visit S.I., who was lying in bed due to a sore leg. For this reason, L.N. became terribly angry, did not go to Moscow and considers this _in_i_n_o_y.

When I began to tell him that for my entire pure, innocent life with him, he could forgive me that I went to visit a sick friend, and with an old uncle at that, L.N. shed tears and said: “Of course, this is true, that your life was pure and beautiful...

We have guests every day; boring, fussy. Leva is not in a good mood in Moscow. Yesterday we were for Leva and Dora at the Maly Theater. Prince Sumbatov's "Gentleman" was walking. Bouvier, a correspondent for the French newspapers Temps and Debats, is having lunch today. You don't have to play the piano. I am intensively rewriting for L.N., correcting proofs and serving him in every possible way.

Last night I had terrible neuralgia...

One hundred days had passed yesterday since Russia imposed retaliatory sanctions against the West. Market participants told what has changed during this time, why some products are becoming more expensive than others - and why this is happening in principle. Experts also saw positive sides to the sanctions; some industries, in their opinion, are even interested in maintaining the embargo.

“Prices have increased somewhat, but within the acceptable limit. Because two to three months is the period for which a normal supplier has safety stock in the warehouse. Plus, chain retail does not revise prices so quickly, and some products have restrictions, for example, the price cannot change by more than 5 rubles. Markets are focusing on chain retail, understanding that if the price on the market is very different, then no one will buy,” notes Dmitry Vostrikov from Rusprodsoyuz.

Vegetables and fruits. This winter you can expect more expensive vegetables and fruits on the shelves. “We will run out of ground vegetables and fruits in December and we will start to feel the effects. Usually we have enough of our own resources for supplies until November. Soon everything will be mostly imported. And given the devaluation and lack of supply within the country, fruits and vegetables will become significantly more expensive in winter,” the expert predicts.

Fish. A Sergei Gudkov from the Fishing Union explains the rise in prices for domestic fish by saying that fishermen simply took advantage of the situation to get a higher profit margin. “That’s why cod prices in Russia have risen from 90 to 145 rubles,” says Gudkov.

He explains that in Russia there is no such practice, which is accepted in the same or England, when fishermen are obliged to sell a certain share of fish products on their shores, that is, within the country. Plus toFishing quotas in Russia are not tied to the obligation to process caught fish on the Russian coast. “The absence of these obligations leads to the fact that Russian fishermen can sell any volume of caught fish anywhere - either to the domestic market or for export. Therefore, prices for domestic fish, for example cod, are formed based on world prices,” he explains. It is clear that fishermen simply will not sell fish inside Russia at a price lower than they can sell it for export.

“The fishermen simply took advantage of the situation to make a larger profit margin. Therefore, prices for cod in Russia rose from 90 to 145 rubles.”

But under the embargo, fishermen made fish prices for Russians even higher than on world markets. “In Norway, the price for supplies to the domestic market is 110 rubles (17 crowns). That is, consumers and processors in Norway receive cod for 110 rubles, and we – for 145. This is what we have now seen thanks to the embargo,” says Sergei Gudkov.

Our native

Some agricultural producers have already managed to increase production volumes. True, each product category has its own characteristics. Thus, pig farming is already receiving dividends from the ban on Western meat. “The most important thing is that the intensive growth of our own production continues,” says Kovalev.

“If we take the annual balance, then we added exactly as much as we did not import in pork imports with our own production. We will not be able to import approximately 180 thousand tons per year, and we will add approximately 170-175 thousand tons from our own production. The situation is worse with lard. Cheap lard in sausages was replaced by poultry, so the demand for poultry increased,” says Kovalev.

According to Rosstat, pork production volumes increased in September by 4% compared to the previous month - to 138.4 thousand tons; in annual terms, the growth for 9 months was 17%. And poultry meat production expanded over three quarters by almost 6% to 3.9 million tons.

However, there are those who suffered in the meat market. These are meat processors that are not part of vertically integrated holdings. “They had to buy expensive raw materials.A pork carcass from the manufacturer cost 65 rubles, but it rose to 250 rubles, an increase many times over. But processed meat products on the counter did not rise in price that much; the consumer of sausage products saw a more modest price. Therefore, meat processing enterprises found themselves in very poor financial condition,” says Vostrikov.

“Now prices for pork from producers have begun to fall. But they fell by 10%, and before that they grew 3.5 times. Therefore, this did not greatly improve the situation of meat processing enterprises. We do not exclude that this industry may go bankrupt or at least change owners,” the expert draws attention to the problems.

In the dairy industry, the volume of domestic production of dairy products continues to grow, plus steel is now “a little more attentive to Russian producers.” But the situation with raw milk has not changed; the raw material is still in short supply. It takes time to fully provide yourself with milk and dairy products. “After all, this is genetics, a natural cycle. If we want to increase the birth rate in the country, we won’t solve this issue in a few days,” says Danilenko. Second, he adds, we need a long-term government strategy that will not change every year. “Because our rules of the game and the level of support for agriculture are adjusted every year, which creates an unstable situation and does not inspire confidence among investors,” the expert notes.

The situation is similar with vegetables and fruits.“We can talk about a win for suppliers of ground vegetables and fruits. Because the demand for their products from online retail has increased. This helped us sell everything that we grew, and this year there was a good harvest,” says Vostrikov from Rusprodsoyuz.

“However, it is unrealistic to radically change something in the fruit and vegetable market in such a short time.To radically change the situation, it is necessary to implement market support for 5-10 years, which includes, in particular, the construction of logistics centers, storage facilities and the development of greenhouses,” he believes. In addition, Vostrikov says, it is necessary that retaliatory sanctions be maintained, and transit shipments through Belarus with the replacement of the country of origin were suppressed. Such favorable conditions will make it possible to free ourselves from fruit and vegetable import dependence.

Thanks to this, two problems have emerged in the domestic fishing industry: the unreasonable increase in prices for domestic fish and problems with its processing. The same problem with the shortage of surimi (the raw material for the production of crab sticks) arises because fishermen do not want to engage in processing. “Most often, surimi is produced on ships by the fishermen themselves. We need technological equipment and specialists. Any processing requires work and time. In production you will get ten times more profit than in processing,” Gudkov explains the reluctance of fishermen to explore new areas of business. “For now we are still living on old stocks, but soon we will have a serious shortage of crab sticks. Even Far Eastern producers of crab sticks are forced to purchase surimi in Japan,” the expert points out.

Meanwhile, fish processing facilities in Russia remain idle. “Our processing plants are no more than half loaded with raw materials. Because there is an ice-free port plus a transport infrastructure that allows you to quickly and inexpensively transport fish to the European market. And fish processing enterprises remain underutilized,” says Gudkov.

The sanctions highlighted these problems. And in light of supporting domestic production, the state should introduce new rules for fishermen. Gudkov proposes that the state motivate fishermen to supply fish to the domestic market and engage in fish processing. Then they will not be able to play with prices and the volume of fish processing will increase.

What am I doing all this time? I'm getting used to it, I guess. I'm trying to understand, I think. After every summer I come back a little different. My summer is a great pilgrimage to myself, and the path is from an introvert who doesn’t want to go outside to a seeker of happiness.

Other people's thoughts and destinies become more important than anything else, and you simply have to swim with this flow. The world begins to look completely different, and the closer the finish line, the brighter the colors.

And I remember. I remember those who were impossible to recognize by the end of the shift. Guys who took advantage of all the opportunities around them and grew incredibly. Those who were outstanding politicians or low traitors; an idealist and freedom fighter or a sage who accumulates and increases the knowledge of the world; a member of a secret society who doubts his choice or a brave warrior who saves the defenseless and weak on dark and forgotten roads...

All of them, perhaps, now see in their dreams the continuation of these stories, and, when they wake up, they do not immediately believe that this actually happened to them. But it did, and it illuminated our games with an incredible light of adventure, dreams, and growth.

Thank you for this summer!

I remember those who came to us for the first time. Frightened and unsure, they learned step by step what Ariadne's Thread was, and for a long time they could not believe that there really was magic here, that you could be friends like this and you could become so close in just three weeks.

There were also those who could not cope, could not get used to the new unusual environment, without a computer and the Internet, but, most importantly, without aggression, without complexes, without boundaries.

Thank you all for this summer! You are incredible. When it seems that everyone who can proudly call themselves an “Ariad child” has already come to us, you come, and suddenly it becomes clear that somewhere in the rainy city there are hundreds of children wandering around. Guys who need a fairy tale come true.

I remember those who, through their deeds and words, have earned the proud title of guardian. I'm not sure I can accurately convey how much work the guys constantly do, working on themselves and helping others.

It's like a steeplechase where you have to run from the candle and not put it out before the finish line. There were difficulties, there were victories - everything was there, and it was proud and beautiful. We will cope with any challenge and we have a lot of interesting things ahead, I am sure of that. I love you and thank you for this summer.

I remember those who achieved incredible heights and became camp trainees. I bow to your intelligence and imagination, to the result of your work. I remember how we made small games, I remember how we held them. I remember how you stood in the detachments and how tired you were, and what necessary conclusions we came to.

I remember how you took on a completely heavy stone in the form of a dark block and dealt with it, showing everyone an example of role-playing and awareness in general. I love you and I'm looking forward to the changes, because soon we will need to name new interns and build a new team. Thank you for this summer!

I remember, of course, those who performed miracles next to me. Such different people, from such different roads, but, having gathered in the camp, everyone, as one, puts on fairy-tale costumes and sets off on a common journey.

The universe has long proven that there are no random people in the Espada, everyone who eventually leaves for a shift had to end up there - sooner or later, one way or another. Thank you that this time it was you, that you spent your time and energy creating fairy-tale worlds. Karma will definitely remember this at the most needed hour. And I won't forget either.

I also remember the parents of our children. When they arrive, they also don’t always feel at ease, but an hour or two passes, and a great change occurs: dads look with envy at the foam swords, moms study the design of locations and also want to heal the wounds of brave warriors or embark on long-distance adventures to meet miracles .

They say “thank you,” and this word most often sounds completely out of place, and I understand what kind of “thank you” it is and for what.

And I am grateful to you for your trust, for being with us, because we exist solely thanks to you and your faith in us. Thank you!

I probably write something similar every time. There are not always enough words to describe and tell it all. Today these words are like this.

Goodbye summer 2017! Goodbye Middle-earth! Thanks for all!