How to forget bad memories? How to let go and forget the past in order to start living in the present: recommendations from psychologists.

These three ways really help you forget the past. For maximum effectiveness, I recommend combining them with each other.

To leave the negative past behind and gain complete control over your life, register for Alexander Gerasimenko’s training “” (June 8-9, Moscow).

The first way to forget the past

Reception of NLP. Imagine a wall with photographs from different moments of your life pasted on it. Here you are going to school, here is your first love, here you have earned your first penny, now a nightmare happens that you are trying to forget... All significant and even some ordinary moments of your life should be on this wall. Imagine all the photos in color, only the negative event in black and white. Step back and look at the wall of your life from the outside. See how much color there is and how small in scale this black and white photograph is. Now mentally shrink it to a size of 3 by 4 cm. Next, continue to “glue” photographs on the wall of your life. Glue the future. Continue filling the wall with paints. Any of your dreams, pleasant moments, vacations, your children, how they go to school... Images in which you help other people. Pictures where people admire you. As a result, a black and white photo will be surrounded on all sides by color photographs that go far away from it. You look at the wall and realize that the incident you want to forget is just a single event. It has its boundaries, it is local and now occupies only an insignificant part of the wall of your life. This black and white photo is not your life. Your life is colorful, bright and desirable.

As a result of this exercise, negative memories were localized, and a life full of happiness and events appeared around them. You have not forgotten the past, you have limited it, and it no longer extends to the present and the future.

The second way to forget the past

Replay in your imagination a depressing, shocking event from your past that you want to forget. Yes, I encourage you to delve into this terrible past that you are so afraid of. But do it in a special way - in the form of a black and white movie with funny music in the background. Turn on the movie and take your seat in the back rows of the theater. Insert laughter from the audience in the audience into your movie. Add hysterical laughter here and there. Play some scenes backwards to make the film funnier. Play your movie until you are no longer afraid of it.

By adding cheerful sounds and distorting the picture, playing it backwards, you can “color” the black and white memories of your past and change your attitude towards them. This technique allows you to correct your memory. You will do the same thing you did in school with a deuce in your diary using a blade. You erased it and drew a four in its place. The “diary” of your life will look great after this exercise, and you will be able to stop worrying about “bad grades” in the past.

The third way to forget the negative past

This method is very practical. It doesn't involve playing with your own mind and not only helps you forget disturbing memories, but also changes the way you think about what happened to you in the past.

I will explain it in metaphorical terms. To begin with, imagine that the past that you need to forget is a nuclear reactor. Even after years, it emits radiation and poisons everything around it. The lives of people living nearby, that is, yours, are infected. You can no longer smell flowers because your sense of smell gives out all the smells distorted. You can feel the fumes from a burnt-out power plant everywhere, which haunts you even in your sleep. Radiation must be eliminated. The reactor must be concreted and the event buried in the past. Yes and please. Concrete!

If your memories bother you and you sit in the kitchen and think “how to forget them,” then you just stir up the ashes and blow on them. Memories continue to poison life. In another case, you may want to escape from painful thoughts and sit down in front of the TV. This does not work. This is the same as covering a radioactive source with oilcloth.

Remember to forget the unpleasant past, it must be concreted. How can I do that? Simple - burying the source of the explosion under massive actions. Our memory is limited in its capabilities and cannot retain everything that we have experienced. The more active actions we took, the more we experienced, the more layers of “concrete” will cover the event that you want to forget.

Those. massive actions that require your 100% attention and will be concrete for an exploded reactor. Keep yourself busy with exciting activities. It's very difficult, you know, to worry about the past when you're skiing down the mountain. It is unlikely that you will remember the negativity that haunts you at the moment when you speak from the podium in front of a large audience.

You need to start laying layers of concrete that don't let your past into your present and future. Take bright, bold, proactive actions and your past will remain in the past.

Magic technique getting your energy back from past relationships. 100% exclusive!

In this article I will talk about the psychotechnique of smooth eye movements (SEM). After applying this simple technique, any unpleasant situation turns into a normal one in just a few minutes. What is important is that all your experience remains with you, you simply erase the mental pain from this traumatic situation.

What's the point? Scientists conducted a sleep study and came to the conclusion that during the REM sleep phase, the pupils of the eyes move left and right for a reason. This organism helps our psyche process all the events of the past day and heal all unpleasant situations. That is, this mechanism is inherent in us by nature itself! And everything that is natural is simple and effective.

So, you have a stressful situation that you periodically remember and want to forget. What to do?

PDG technique to forget an awkward situation

Sit or lie down comfortably.
Be sure to write down the situation you will be working on and its intensity level on a 10-point scale (0 - minimum, 10 - maximum). This way you can track the real effectiveness of this and any other psychotechniques.
You close your eyes and begin to remember the unpleasant situation, but not just remember and race in your head, as you usually do. And at the same time you begin to move the pupils of your eyes left and right.
Smoothly in one direction, then in the other. Absolutely without straining your eyes, without trying to move your pupils as far to the left or to the right as possible.
The main criterion for performance is absolutely smooth eye movements without tension. And no violence against yourself. If you are tired, take a break for a couple of minutes or continue next time you have time.
Try not to hold your breath while performing the technique. Of course, you won’t be able to do everything right away - remember the situation, move your pupils, and track your breathing. But over time you will succeed, the main thing is to gain at least minimal experience.
You will be surprised, literally after 3-5 minutes of practice the situation loses its intensity and its importance disappears. If you spend a little more time, the painful situation simply ceases to be remembered.
Start with the most charged situations in your life, the ones you remember most often. And work through them first. Then work through all situations, down to the most insignificant ones. This way you can heal your entire past quite quickly!

In the PDH technique, there is no such thing that you need to do a minimum of so many repetitions in 1 session, otherwise the result will not be consolidated or there will be a rollback. The technique is recoilless, you can always continue from the “place” where you left off last time. There is no minimum or maximum number of eye movement cycles.

There is even a whole branch of psychotherapy built on this mechanism of eye movements - EMDR therapy or desensitization of experiences with eye movements. This therapy is recommended by WHO for working with the consequences of traumatic events. The whole point is that if you come to an EMDR therapist, he will ask you to follow his fingers and will move them left and right throughout the session, keeping your attention on the negative situation. That's all.

I told you a modification of this technique, which you can use yourself with no less effectiveness. The technique is really very effective. And, most importantly, it is very simple. Even a child can master it. The advantage is that PDG can be done anywhere. On the way to work, in the evening before bed, in a traffic jam, anywhere you can close your eyes!

How to forget unpleasant memories - video

For those who don’t understand anything, I have posted a short video demonstration of this technique below.

By the way, anyone who is familiar with the recapitulation technique of Carlos Castaneda will be interested to know that the basis of his recapitulation is precisely the PDG technique. Because when you close your eyes and move your head left and right, the pupils of your eyes also move left and right. Castaneda simply added to the PDG technique a mystical legend that with every inhalation and exhalation you can regain energy from the past. In fact, the effectiveness of Castaneda's recapitulation is based solely on the PDH mechanism :-).

But there are also memories that you cannot forget, no matter how hard you try.

Just as a tree, if it begins to dry out, needs the help of a gardener, so a person, in order to get out of the labyrinth of his past, needs help from outside. This formula was derived by Albert Einstein more than 100 years ago:

It is impossible to solve a problem at the same level at which it arose. You need to rise above this problem by rising to the next level.

I help solve such problems successfully.

Sincerely, Alexander Yakovlev

Hello, dear readers! Our whole life is a series of events. Some are forgotten instantly, while others can cause pain for a considerable time. They spoil your mood, cause negative feelings and complicate the future.

Today we will talk about how to forget unpleasant memories. You will learn how they are formed, how they actually affect your life, why you concentrate on them and how the previous life once and for all.

Where do memories come from?

As a rule, memories do not come out of nowhere. They are caused by other people's words, new events, some objects with which you have a connection. They can be destroyed and created. At one time we constantly think about rest, another we devote to relationships with a person, and a third to an unpleasant episode.

Your brain tries to keep close information that is important to you, but it is not able to judge its “importance” itself. Therefore, if you often think about a certain moment, the brain assigns this situation the category “significant” and deliberately resumes the process at every opportunity.

In addition to frequency, intensity and emotionality also matter to the brain. We devote more time to some thoughts, while we consider others to be “thought out far and wide.” These events fade into the background.

A person is not able to influence his own brain and change the category of significance of an event, but he can contribute to the fact that the memory fades into the background. To do this, you need to try to devote as little time as possible to unpleasant thoughts from the past. You cannot get rid of a sudden impulse of thought, but you calmly control the discussion: it’s up to you to devote an hour to it or just a few minutes.

You will not find anything new if you constantly pour the problem from empty to empty. Perhaps you like to share your emotions and the state that this event causes. Remember that the longer you continue to do this, the longer the damage to your psyche will continue.

You need to remove your emotional attachment. Make it real.

Emotionality

More than once I have come across articles from the Internet on psychology on this topic, in which people are advised to avoid places and events that evoke unpleasant memories. I don't entirely agree with this recommendation. Firstly, because most often it is quite difficult to do, and, secondly, it is not entirely correct.

Let's talk a little about something pleasant. The process is the same. Think back to your last vacation. When you were just returning from it, a program on TV or the word “travel” from the lips of a friend evoked a wave of emotions, memories of the beach, sea, cities and museums, as well as a long story about a recent trip. Time passed, and the story became shorter and less emotional.

By avoiding, you replace some unpleasant emotions with others and continue. You increase the time to overcome. You carry a burden within yourself, deliberately try to avoid certain places, and drown out the pain. At the same time, notice that you do not stop thinking about the incident.

Sooner or later, you will have to face something that will cause a relapse, but if in a normal rhythm by this time it would no longer cause so many feelings, then if it lasts for a long time it will become much brighter. You risk not just encountering an object that evokes unpleasant memories, but looking into the eyes of real fear.

Imagine you have a child and he is afraid of clowns. You try in every possible way to protect him from the object: do not go to toy stores, avoid circuses and public events. At age 12, when he returns from school, he finally encounters a clown. Do you think he will forget about his phobia or will he run home pale and in shock? Wouldn't it be better to slowly teach him that there is nothing demonic about clowns?

Don’t be afraid to face what revives in you, but try to talk and think about them less and less.

One frank conversation

First of all, you should discuss in detail an event from the past that evokes emotions in you. Ideally, it would be nice to discuss it with a psychologist, but you can also talk to a friend.

Discuss to your heart's content, don't be afraid to share. You must speak out and achieve maximum results. You should not have unspoken thoughts that will continue to torment your soul. Decide everything so as not to continue to look for new conclusions.

I can also recommend you a book Jose Silva "Mind Control", in which you will find real techniques to reduce the pressure of an event on the psyche, as well as many other valuable recommendations for improving your life.

See you again and don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.

Even with great effort, we cannot always forget certain situations from the past. However, there are several simple ways that you can get rid of unpleasant memories and start life with a clean slate.

Our life is divided into three categories - past, present and future. In each of these periods, certain moments happen to us that are impossible to forget. In this article we will talk about what has already happened to us, and about what we need to leave in the past forever in order to start living again.

Memories of the past are moments that we can no longer forget. It doesn’t matter whether they are pleasant or not, we will always visualize them in our minds, because they are an inseparable part of us. The past is the basis of our life. Every day we live can bring something pleasant and new into our lives, or it can upset us. Unfortunately, we cannot control our destiny and we do not know when something important will happen to us. Because of this, unpleasant moments occur in our lives, which leave behind not only consequences, but also negative memories. The site's experts bring to your attention several ways in which you can let go of the past and start a new life.

Main causes of negative memories

Living in the past is a thankless task. Sometimes a person involuntarily mentally returns to his previous life and tries to realize his mistakes. However, to get rid of negative memories, you need to understand the reasons for their occurrence.

Death of a loved one. It is this memory that is almost impossible to get rid of; you can only come to terms with it. The death of a loved one can not only turn our life upside down, but divide it into “before” and “after”. For a long time, a person feels lonely, especially if he has lost a person who has always been his main support and support and with whom he has many pleasant memories.

Breakup or betrayal. The betrayal of a loved one is very difficult to survive. Cheating leaves a deep wound in the heart and makes us completely disappointed in the opposite sex. Breakup is also one of the biggest shocks in our lives. As a rule, such memories fade into the background only with the advent of new love. However, the fear of being abandoned again never leaves us.

Moving. Longing for old places and old acquaintances - this is what people who change their place of residence face. Over time, we get used to a new city, make new friends, but memories of familiar places never leave us. In this case, you just need to get used to your new life and find your advantages in it. Try to look back as little as possible, otherwise moments of the past will never leave your consciousness.

Wrong choice of profession. Even in childhood, parents try to prove to us that one profession is much better or easier than another. Having enlisted the support of loved ones, we make a choice and don’t even think about the consequences. Many years pass, and we remember with bitterness those times when we were choosing a future profession, and we think that now it not only does not bring us the expected income, but also deprives us of joy. Many people say that it’s never too late to change your life, which means that in order to get rid of negative memories and hated work, you just need to make a decision on your own and finally choose the type of activity that you like.

Ways to get rid of negative memories

Before you learn about ways to get rid of negative memories, be in a positive mood. Don't forget that besides the unpleasant moments in life there are many good things. Suffering and complaining is not a way out of the situation. In this way, you harm yourself by refusing to let go of the past and start living with a clean slate.

Analyze your past. Before you get rid of negative memories, you need to understand some aspects of your past. At this stage you need:

Let go of the past. Having experienced a series of failures, a person begins to think that one day they will repeat in his life, and thereby attracts them. Whatever mistakes you have made in the past, you must let go of the memories of them. You don’t have to put up with the fact that troubles will happen in your life, try to imagine your future in a better light.
Admit your guilt. Everything that happens in our lives is partly our fault. You should not blame other people for your problems, because no one decides what you should do in a certain situation. To start life again, you need to admit that your mistakes are your fault. This way you can draw conclusions for yourself and avoid difficulties in the future.
Forget your mistakes. Perhaps you once betrayed a loved one or committed another, no less bad act. This does not mean that memories of him and feelings of shame should haunt you throughout your life. At this stage, it is important to understand that you are a person, and it is common for any person to make mistakes. Your task is to avoid doing things in the future that will cause you to torment yourself.

After analyzing your past, you must draw a conclusion for yourself. If at this stage you have gotten rid of some unpleasant memories and were able to forgive yourself, then you did everything right.

Learn from the past. Everything that happens to us should not disappear without a trace. Even from an unpleasant situation, you can learn a useful lesson that will help you avoid mistakes in the future. Our past is an invaluable experience, because all the events that happened directly related to us. Your task is to draw the main and useful things from it and let it go. However, not many people are able to do this. Many continue to step on the same rake, clinging to a past life and making mistake after mistake.

Freeing yourself from negative memories. The most important stage has come, in which you must completely get rid of negative memories. To do this you will need:

Choose the right attitude. Start every morning with the thought that today will bring you new pleasant memories.
Psychological trick with water. If negative memories do not leave you, turn on the tap and imagine that they flow away together with water.
Get rid of things that have negative memories associated with them. If there are things in your house that you have negative memories associated with, get rid of them. For example, after breaking up with your loved one, you don’t need to keep gifts and photos together, no matter how dear they are to you. One look at them will pull you back into the past, preventing you from moving forward.
Change the environment. If the atmosphere around you makes you sad and provokes unpleasant memories, make changes to it. In this case, you can do repairs or buy new furniture. If you have long wanted to change your place of residence, then the time has come to take action. Such chores will not only help you take your mind off negative thoughts, but will also be the first step towards starting a new life.
Change appearance. To understand your true inner state, you need to look at yourself in the mirror. Most likely, your appearance will make even you feel sorry for yourself. Think about whether your memories are worth such sacrifices? Head to the beauty salon, fitness center and boutique shopping. Change your appearance so that, looking at your reflection, you feel confident and ready for new victories and achievements.
Thank and forgive your offenders. Of course, you don’t need to make a personal meeting with every offender, but mentally you must forgive them, even if it is not easy. Resentment, hatred, anger, desire for revenge - all this is an extra burden that prevents you from starting a new life. Get rid of it and you will feel better.
Master meditation. Meditative practices help you relax and free your thoughts from everything unnecessary, including negative memories. With the help of meditation, you will learn to focus your attention only on important and pleasant things, which means that the past itself will fade into the background.
Get rid of bad habits. Bad habits clog a person's life. The minutes that you could spend on something more important and useful are spent to your detriment. First of all, you need to get rid of alcohol. Alcoholic drinks negatively affect the nervous system, and while drinking them, people begin to be overcome by memories of a past life and negative thoughts. By getting rid of addictions, you will be doing a huge service to yourself and your body.

Meditation to get rid of unpleasant thoughts and memories

Meditation is the best way to relax and get rid of negative memories. This meditation practice is distinguished by its simplicity, and it can be performed at any time of the day.

To begin, choose a quiet place and sit comfortably. It is best to do meditation in nature, but if you do not have such an opportunity, you can do it at home, but be sure to be alone.

Imagine that you are in a beautiful place, a harmonious, peaceful environment reigns around you, and the only thing stopping you from taking a step forward is the heavy bag that you are holding in your hands. In your mind you should open it and see that there are stones in it. Imagine that each of them is one of your unpleasant memories. Start mentally throwing them out of your life by repeating:

I let go of my past;
I myself can control my thoughts;
I am free from my memories;
I am ready to part with my memories and start a new life;
I live in the present;
I love only myself and my family;
I will be able to meet new love;
I will find

If only it were possible to erase, erase from memory those memories that cause pain, leaving, deep in the soul, an indelible mark. Every person has those moments of the past that they want to forget forever. I agree, it’s not that easy to do...But nothing is impossible!

In addition to today's problems, most modern people are burdened with negative memories from the past.

Resentments, fears, hatred, negative events - all this happened once in the past, but a person continues to carry it within himself today.

Over time, the details are erased, but the feelings of discomfort remain.

Nothing can be changed, perhaps the offenders are no longer in this world or such situations can no longer exist, but the person continues to remember this with persistence worthy of another use.

And when some situation reminds them of this, they experience these events within themselves again and again.

They constantly think about how to get rid of negative memories, but they cannot do it.

But all this only leads to a waste of time and effort. When your feelings and emotions are wasted.

And by adulthood, this negative experience accumulates, leading to various diseases, problems in life, and the development of phobias.

A person turns into a tourist through life, carrying a load of negative memories from the past within himself.

And on the faces of such people you can see the STAMP OF TIME - wrinkles, dull eyes, tension.

Go outside and you will immediately see such people.

Look at the elderly people - some walk briskly and smile, while others are literally bent over and can barely drag themselves along. And undoubtedly a big contribution to this was made by the burden of negative memories from the past.

Look at successful people. All of them have problems too, and many more of them than the average person, but you won't see it on their faces.

Perhaps you yourself carry the burden of the past within yourself, which prevents you from moving on.

Even if you are now a master of sports in martial arts, and someone bullied you at school, you can’t get it back

Now you are a different person and why carry the burden of the past with you. Drop your backpack and move forward freely.

What difference does it make what happened yesterday? The main thing is that it is today, and the best is of course yet to come.

If there is still an opportunity to correct the situation, then do it. If not, then just forget it.

But this is where most people have problems.

The fact is that in the life of a modern person there are too few emotions, especially positive ones.

Therefore, he tries to replace them with something - and negative memories help with this, giving him the opportunity in his imagination to deal with the offender and gain moral satisfaction, each time coming up with new ways of revenge.

But you need to get rid of this if you want to move forward and achieve success in this life.

I offer you a simple but very effective method that will help you find the answer to the question - How to get rid of negative memories.

Take a piece of paper, sit down alone in a calm atmosphere and, so to speak, pour out all your grievances, fears, everything that haunts you at the moment. You need to feel them one last time - most likely tears will come to your eyes - this is even for the better.

Write all this down in detail, and then just burn this piece of paper. Take a piece of paper with your hand and set it on fire from the opposite end and watch how your fears and grievances burn in the fire, while at the same time imagining the same process within yourself.

If it doesn't help the first time, do this several times.

And I assure you, every time the emotional coloring will weaken.

And very soon you will lose interest in your grievances and over time the negative experience will dissolve, leaving free space for new impressions and achievements.

And I assure you, they will.

Therefore, if you have a load of negative memories, then use this method on the next weekend. Don't think about whether it will help or not. Just DO IT.

And very soon fresh colors will appear in your life!